it's raining MENUs

I know how devastating it can feel when dinner time arrives and you haven't prepared anything to feed your family. I've danced the last-minute, throw-together-anything-that-comes-in-a-can (and pray that it tastes good) tango and it ain't pretty. Making the food isn't the stressful part of meal planning. Coming up with spur of the moment meals is the hard part.. And when you have a brilliant idea, it's rare you have all the necessary ingredients. Too many of us are surfing the isles of the supermarket at 5 pm (with hungry children yapping at our heals) because we can't answer dreaded question: "What's for dinner?"

Planning meals for your family can be SIMPLE but many of us make it more complicated than it needs to be. These tips will help you make a menu for YOUR family-- a routine you can stick to.. Stop stressing-- and start planning!

How to plan a weekly MENU for your family:

1. Make a list of the meals your family loves to eat.
Get a blank piece of paper and a pen that writes well. Make the list with your family or alone. Type it on the computer, if you'd rather. Write ANYTHING comes to your mind... YOU are the only one who can make this list. Get crackin'.

2. Pick FIVE dinner ideas off your master list.
Five meals, that's all. I know there are seven days in one week, but plan on eating leftovers as least one night and get a sitter and go out on a date the other. (This is your reward for being the best mom ever.) Five meals-- the simpler the better, especially when you're new at this. Did you circle five meals? Don't stress about variety, calories, time prep. Just pick your favorite.

3. Assign a side dish (and a day of the week) for each meal.
For example: Sunday- roast and potatoes, Monday - salmon and green beans, Tuesday- spaghetti and corn, Wednesday- lobster tail and asparagus, Thursday- pancakes and eggs, Friday- date night (frozen pizza for the kids!) Saturday - leftovers! Your list will (hopefully) look a bit different than your neighbors.

3. Gather the recipes.
Collect recipes for ONLY those five meals. Print them off the internet, call your grandma and hand-write what she says (word-fer-word), tear them out of the cookbook, if you feel like it! Place the five recipes in front of you. We started a recipe exchange HERE. Feel free to add your favorite meals to the list!

4. Make a shopping list.
Start with Sunday's meal and list the ingredients you need to buy. Then move onto Monday and Tuesday... until you have a master grocery shopping list.

5. Shop!
Remember to bring your grocery list, but please leave the children behind. I repeat, do NOT take anyone shopping with you under the age of 18. Not this week, at least. Go late at night, wake up with the sun, or get a friend to watch your kids in the afternoon. Go shopping alone and enjoy your quiet time. Buy everything on your list!

6. Unpack your groceries in the pantry and refrigerator.
Don't allow the kids to touch them, not yet. You need to know where these ingredients are, which means, you need to put them in their place. (Kids can assist in a week or two!)

7. Start your engines... and get cookin'
Give yourself enough time to prepare. Assign the children special jobs to help. If it's a simple meal (and one you know they'll eat) everyone will be happy to help with dinner prep. Enjoy your time in the kitchen... and your stress free week!

8. At the end of the week, evaluate your menu.
Did you LOVE every meal? if so, start again and make every meal exactly the same. If you didn't like a certain meal, replace it with another on your master list. Do you want more variety? Change it up a bit, but don't go crazy. Stick to what you know and what you love. (if these are your favorite meals, your family shouldn't complain about eating them once a week.)

*If you've mastered steps 1-8 and catch yourself singing "I feel good... and I knew that I would!" in the kitchen, you have my permission to move on.

9. Branch out-- and spread your wings!
Use ingredients from your food storage. Pick a new recipe with healthier ingredients. Make something your kids have never eaten before. Give a little variety to your palate (don't have chicken EVERY night, etc.) Heaven forbid, make something from SCRATCH! Read grocery store ads or your favorite coupon clipping websites (Hi Fab FruGals!) Buy several items if they are on sale, especially if you know you'll use them (spaghetti sauce, green chilies, pancake mix :) Try to save a little more money by incorporating a few other "factors" into your menu. You can even go digital, by entering in your recipes/shopping lists on Google calendars and having them emailed/texted to you.. Whoa. If this stresses you out, forgettaboutit! Breathe deep and start again at #1.

10. Make a monthly menu!
Once you're planning your weekly menus like a professional, try making FOUR weeks of meals. Print out a monthly calendar and write each meal for every day of the month. Shop in BULK for items you use often. You can keep 4 rotating weekly menus (with the recipes and shopping lists already organized...) You must still shop for produce once a week... And if you're a super-duper pro (which I am not) you could add breakfast and lunch into the mix. Imagine... 3 meals a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year. We can do it! Yes we can!

10 dinner time tips

Cartoon courtesy of the New Yorker

I am a mother of four boys, a wife to one (boy also) and owner of a brand new puppy (finally... a girl!). As the nurturer in my home, I have the solemn responsibility of feeding my family. This is not an easy task. I have spent the last few years making family meals my top priority. Dinner time can be stressful, exhausting and frustrating... but it doesn't have to be. When I wake up with a plan, dinnertime is fun, entertaining, enjoyable and sometimes even delicious. This list is for anyone who wants to make FAMILY DINNER a priority in 2011.

*There are no pictures because everyone's table will look different. Please remember: It's not about how it looks-- it's ALL about how it feels.

1. Use a menu. You have to know what's for dinner in order to prepare for it! (duh!) I make a rotating menu once a month and shop once a week, mainly for produce. Having a menu will calm you down and keep the kids from asking "What's for dinner???" Make sure your menu is full of recipes that you all like :) If you need help planning a menu, go HERE for a few simple steps!

2. Let the children help! Even the youngest kids can help find ingredients, mix a salad, open a can, measure a cup of water, etc. My three older kids rotate each day with the following jobs: help mom prepare the food, set the table & take care of the baby. Sometimes they rotate between all three jobs in preparation for ONE meal! Keeping all of the kids occupied before dinner will add a feeling of cooperation in the kitchen... and it will help build confidence in your children.

3. Put a tablecloth on the table. This sounds simple, but it means you are preparing for something special. The tablecloth doesn't have to be fancy. In fact, it will be less stressful if it's not... then the kids can spill without worrying about being scolded. Rotate your tablecloths-- buy one for Halloween, Valentine's Day, birthdays, etc. Make sure it's machine washable!

4. Set a TIME for dinner. Set it and keep it. This will give help you know when to start preparing. Make sure each family member knows it's time to eat! Be consistent. If it's important to you, it will eventually become important to the entire family. (If dad can't make it home on time, start without him!)

5. Turn off the television. I can't stress this enough.... turn the damn TV off! Dinner time is for family bonding. Do not let the TV (or cell phones!)take over this sacred time. Leave the electronics alone for an hour-- this includes adults! Music is only allowed if it's quiet and it contributes to the positive atmosphere. Be careful on which activities your family has going... Don't allow soccer, dance, whatever-it-may-be to get in the way of dinner, if you can help it. It's too important!

6. It's ALL about the conversation. Ask questions, tell stories, make up jokes, center your conversation around FUN topics. Avoid anything stressful or controversial (money, grades, behavioral problems, etc.) Ask questions that elicit conversation (with no wrong answers!) Start your own conversation jar with questions to draw from. If we can get our kids used to talking to us while they're young, it won't be so awkward when they become teenagers.

7. Keep a dictionary next to the table. It sounds silly, but you wouldn't believe how much you can learn from a dictionary! A dictionary can settle "arguments" as well as enlighten your already stimulating conversation. And if all else fails, learn a new word each night and make everyone use it in a sentence.

8. Start your own dinner time traditions. We have tacos for dinner E.V.E.R.Y. Tuesday. A simple tradition we started that we just can't (and don't want to) break. Make pizza on Fridays. Pick a theme night once a month. Dance around the table before everyone sits down to eat. Hold hands while saying the prayer. Eat by candlelight. Have a picnic on the floor. Make everyone eat with a large serving spoon. Eat food only one color... the possibilities are endless! Start your own traditions that the kids will look forward to and will continue with their children.

9. Teach your kids to clean up their own spills. Don't cry over spilled milk. Have plenty of napkins available and let them do the work. I also allow my children to make their own food if they don't agree with the food on the table. Many a peanut butter and jelly sandwiches have been made over the years. I don't care as much as long as I don't have to do the dirty work. After dinner is over, stay in the kitchen and clean up together!

10. Invite friends over! Once you've got a routine going, invite someone to join you! Of course, this cannot and should not be every day. But inviting friends (either yours, your kids or both!) can really break up a dull routine and it will force you to prepare in advance. Be sure to use a recipe that's been tested and tried... and make sure to invite the right family! jk. sort of.

Before I finish this post, I wanted to share a few fascinating statistics on family dinner. If these don't convince you the importance of eating together as a family, I don't know what will:

• Family dinners are more important than play, story time and other family events in the development of vocabulary of younger children. (Harvard Research, 1996)

• Frequent family meals are associated with a lower risk of smoking, drinking and using drugs; with a lower incidence of depressive symptoms and suicidal thoughts; and with better grades in 11 to 18 year olds. (Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, 2004)

• Adolescent girls who have frequent family meals, and a positive atmosphere during those meals, are less likely to have eating disorders. (University of Minnesota, 2004)

• The average parent spends 38.5 minutes per week in meaningful conversation with their children. (A.C. Nielsen Co.)

For more on the information and statistics of family dinner read HERE and HERE and HERE and HERE and HERE.

Let's make the world a better place, one family meal at a time!Copy and paste the picture code to your blog (add a gadget, html code) so others will make Family Dinner a priority in their home.

<a href="http://www.thatswhatjanetsaid.blogspot.com/2011/01/10-dinner-time-tips.html" target="_blank"><img src="http://i249.photobucket.com/albums/gg214/ajshumway/familydinner-1.jpg" width="160" height="160" /></a>

Happy family dining!

time out

...you think I am a terrible mom, don't you?

Well. In my defense, he climbed in there himself and was quite happy about it...
until he realized that he couldn't stand up. Then he threw a fit.

And so we left him in there until he calmed down.
It was only an hour or so. What? I needed to get the house clean... sucka!

time out

...you think I am a terrible mom, don't you?

Well. In my defense, he climbed in there himself to be protected from the dog.
and he was happy and content
until he realized he was locked in
when he tried to stand up, he threw an absolute tizzy
so we left him in there until he calmed down
It was only an hour or so. What? I needed to get the house clean... sucka!

sunny and me

This morning, Zack handed me a picture he drew of the "girls" in the family.
We never officially named her Sunny, but it's what we've fallen back on since we can't come to a unanimous decision. I believe it's here to stay. She is a darling little puppy (much cuter than Zack's interpretation) and we all adore her. How could you not love that face???
A couple of times while out running with her in the mornings, I will see our shadows and think, "That CANNOT be me. Is that really me, running with a dog?" And I find it hilarious that my family members are shocked when they ask how things are going and I respond positively. My mom and sister said to their husbands (while still talking to me) "Hey! Janet's going to keep the dog!" As if they expected me to give her up after a week.. I've never been an animal lover before (and I am still not) but when they are your own, it's different. She's a lot of work, but when you sacrifice for someone/thing, you learn to love and appreciate them more. I did a LOT of soul-searching and a LOT of reading (specifically on her breed) before we made the decision to get her. It wasn't a last minute thing. It's been a long process and I am so glad I finally caved in! Needless to say, we are definitely keeping her...
A big thanks to Val for taking these photos. She lives down the street from my parents and was able to meet Sunny the day after Christmas... I wish she would stay this little forever!