29 weeks 5 days.

If I didn't have that little counter on the sidebar of my blog, I would tell you I was 3 months pregnant. I cannot believe 30 weeks is around the corner. I am starting to feel a wee bit uncomfortable. especially at 3 am. But I have lots of energy, I am fairly happy and all seems right in my world. I am not anxious for the baby to come because 10 weeks and 2 days is exactly enough time for me to finish up my life as a mother of three. Change is gonna come. It always does. And I am planning on embracing it-- even if it kicks my butt.

During my pregnancy with child #1, my husband casually told me that I had LOST MY SPARKLE. It was one of the most devastating things anyone has ever said to me. After the words crossed his lips, he knew it was a mistake. Of course, over the years, I have been able to joke about it and can now use it as an excuse for those no-good, terrible days during subsequent pregnancies. "Sorry honey, I wasn't able to clean today. I spent the afternoon looking for my sparkle..." He hates when I tease him about it-- and the fact that I am now documenting it on the blog might cause some serious marital problems. But I don't think he knows that I changed my url to fairlyhappy. So let's keep everything under wraps. If you don't tell him, I surely won't.

If you ask me, my sparkle hasn't gone anywhere in the past 29 weeks. I feel fantastic. I don't think I have been this emotionally stable in a good 2 years... maybe longer. And even during the first 18 weeks when I was struck down with morning sickness, I was bursting with happiness. I think going through such a rough time period made me better able to appreciate the little things... and oddly enough those low moments are some of my most treasured experiences. When it's really dark, the smallest flicker of a candle makes such a difference. And when the sun finally shines, it's unbelievably bright. and warm. and peaceful.

I don't know if you've noticed, but my camera has been out of commission for the past few weeks. Actually, the camera is fine. I just misplaced the battery charger. (It's probably hiding under a couch cushion along with my sparkle.) Luckily, my boys have a totally ghetto Star Wars camera. I didn't know it actually worked until Ben snapped this picture of Luke and me this evening. It's small and grainy and I had no clue a real photo would come out of it-- but here's proof. Not too shabby for an $8 [somewhat digital] camera.


So, here I am at 29 weeks and 5 days pregnant-- standing next to my scrumptious six year old who combed his own hair before we left the house. If God wants to spoil me, he will send me another brown-eyed boy.

My belly is expanding along with every other body part.. particularly my face, arms, butt, ankles. I have gained 30 lbs so far. If I drink Slim Fast for the next 10 weeks, I might accomplish my goal of gaining the "typical" 25 lbs. Then and only then, will I be genuinely happy....

self-portraits

Art projects for the day: self-portraits. We learned about Jan van Eyck and his famous turban painting from 1433, which might possibly be the first self portrait ever. But no one knows for sure-- there weren't cameras back then to prove what he looked like. Anyway, the boys were assigned to draw themselves while looking in a mirror. I was very pleased with the final product...

For the first time ever, Ben's freckles are finally under control. He's got a big grin-- and 6's in his ears. Perfect.

Of course Luke is sticking out his tongue in his portrait... because, apparently, that's how he looks at himself in the mirror. ps- the scanner makes his skin look like a mess, when the original is something to be proud of.

And after Zack was done with his self-portrait, I said, "Wow, Zack! Is that you?" He replied, "Nope. It's Doc Ock." Well then, that explains the 8 arms.

NOT back to school

it's hard to get excited about starting a new school year- because we never really had an official break... But our homeschooling group made it a little easier by throwing another NOT Back 2 School party. I didn't bring my camera, but these pics were emailed to me. We love, LOVE our homeschooling friends-- they are the smartest, most polite kids you will ever meet and their moms are just--- well, wonderful.

the NOT-back-to-school party consisted of watermelon, lots of cookies, legos, charades, delicious cupcakes with too much frosting, water fights, laughing and friends. No backpacks, homework, whistles, saying goodbye or lunch ladies with hair nets. There was ONE rule however= no kids on the fancy couches.. in this top picture, you can see that both Sabrina and I are lecturing Zack and Sylvia about breaking the only rule. Those naughty three year olds..


As far as our day-to-day "routine" is concerned, I think we deserve an A+ when it comes to learning. But I am a pretty lenient teacher. This is a typical day in our house.

6 am: mom wakes up, exercises, makes a lunch for dad, cleans a bit
7 am: dad leaves for work
8 am-ish: the boys wake up, everyone eats breakfast
8:30 am: make beds, brush teeth, get dressed, daily chore.
9 am: morning "devotional" Prayer, a scripture verse or two, silly songs, the pledge of allegiance, an Article of Faith (we rotate a new one every week) and more silly songs.
9:30 am-12 pm: math, science, spelling, history-- all the boring stuff. Zack will join in or do puzzles while Ben and Luke "study"
12:30 pm: lunch
1-4 pm: QUIET TIME. My favorite time of the day. 4/5 days, I take a nap. The kids play quietly on the computer or watch a movie. There is one major rule during quiet time... if I hear them, they have to lay down by me. Which means, they are extra good. If I am not napping, I will take a bubble bath, sew or read. Again, I love this time of day.
4-6 pm: Get ready for daddy to come home.. deep cleaning, dinner prep, etc. and maybe a bit more schooling if we didn't finish what we should have in the morning..
6-ish pm: dinner.
8 pm: Bedtime routine.. pj's, brush teeth, scriptures, a bit of reading and finally SILENCE. The boys still sleep in the same room and they can stay up as late as they want, but they CANNOT come out of their room unless they're bleeding.
10 pm: lights out everywhere. I love going to bed early. Aaron plays sports 2-3 nights a week or stays up late watching sporting events of the day. The US Open just started today...

*daily schedule is subject to change by authorized parent. For instance, mom might find it necessary to go swimming during the morning hours and push schooling back to quiet time.. that is, if she's willing to sacrifice her prized nap. **Must also note that Daddy hardly ever returns from work at 6 pm.**

It's definitely a busy day, but it's so worth it. I realize things are really going to change with a new baby... but I KNOW I can handle a few hours of teaching.. I think I can, I think I can. The thought of sending my kids off for such a long day with so little time to play is heartbreaking for me. I would probably be on board with public school if they had at least two hours of recess. The law requires adults to get a 15 minute break every 2 hours of work. How is it possible that our kids don't get the same amount of breaks? Nonsense, says I.

Some days (like yesterday, for instance) I feel exhausted and frustrated. I wonder if I am doing the right thing. I stress about their social life, testing skills, ability to ever leave my side and I dream about what it would be like to be free... but I am reminded again and again that this is the best thing for our family, right now. It's a sacrifice, no doubt. But it's also rewarding in ways that are unexplainable.

In just a few short hours of homeschooling today, these were my rewards:

• hearing the first words out of Zack's mouth this morning, "Mom! It's Tuesday AND it's September. Yahoo!"
• laughing over a few silly things Luke changed on his vocabulary worksheet that was entirely too easy for him. He was supposed to fill in a few blanks to the sentence, "Bob took a nap on the cot." After Luke was finished, it read, "Bub took a crap on the cat." Completely terrible, I know... but he knew it would make us laugh. I almost peed my pants.. we giggled over that for a good ten minutes. I wonder what his 1st grade teacher would have done at the local school-- probably slap him with a ruler...
  
• sending Ben and Luke to the Springs Preserve on a field trip with other homeschooling friends. It was a Nature Exchange and they loved every minute of it. I love that their schedules are flexible and open, as a child's should be.
  
• listening to Luke teach Zack his letters while Ben and I worked on multiplication.. Luke doesn't need the special instructions because his brain loves to multiply. Zack is doing incredible and he will be reading before we know it. Reading [honestly] comes naturally-- even to the wild ones.
• overhearing their "bedtime conversation" which is usually about Star Wars or Transformers. Not tonight. Tonight, they were discussing how cool it would be to live in Alaska-- because for two weeks in the summer, the sun never goes down. They thought they wouldn't have to go to sleep if it was light all day. When I peeked my head in and said that I would gladly move to Alaska, as long as they hibernated in the winter for two weeks when the sun doesn't come up. They groaned and shrieked, "Never mind! Never mind! We don't want to move there!" Thank goodness.. it's way too cold for my warm-bloodedness.

The sun comes up, and we'll start again....

Mr Mom

I uploaded the following pictures to my 2009 book, but never shared them with the internet world. These were taken when I was on bedrest with Simon-- about 35 weeks pregnant. I can't really put into words what these pictures mean to me, and I am sure that's exactly why I never uploaded them to the blog. I was trying to find the best way to describe how I felt when they were taken, but still... no words. I can give a little background though. I went into pre-term labor with Simon and was trying my best to stay pregnant. I wanted to have him at home and knew he needed to wait to come! The boys and I were really restless in the house and one day we "cheated" and went to our favorite park. This is our favorite park because no one else is ever there... and you can park right next to the playground. I told the boys they could play as long as they wanted, as long as they didn't need me to get out of the car. I sat in the driver's seat watching Ben play "mother". He went back and forth between the younger kids. I searched around the car and was so happy to find my camera. I took these pictures from afar... what I wouldn't have given to have my nice zoom-in lens! They are terrible quality, but they are priceless to me. The underdog shot is my fave.

I also took this series of Luke. These make me laugh because they are just so... Luke. He is SUCH a great boy, too. But not because he's taking care of anyone else. He's usually in his own world, making weird sounds and having a great time-- pushing an empty swing or spinning by himself. He was probably twisting around on his swing for a solid 20 minutes. I got dizzy just taking a few snapshots of him.

While Luke was spinning in la-la-land, Ben was cheering Zack down the slide. Zack was almost 4 years old, mind you, and had been sliding down that baby slide for years before this outing. Ben just found it needful to be Mr. Mom and be at the bottom to give him a big hug for sliding down all by HIMSELF! so cute.

And last but not least, I was fortunate enough to catch the older boys giving each other running high-fives. They missed a couple of times, but finally eventually got it. I love their flying legs, especially.

I love that they love each other the way they do. In their 8 years together, they have only gotten into a handful of disagreements, and mild ones at that. One of the sweetest things about scout camp this last week was how excited they were after the first day. Ben proudly told Aaron when we arrived home, "Dad! Do you know how lucky we are? We were the only brothers there!" Having them so close in age totally paid off...

Scout camp pictures to come........ maybe.

friday.saturday.sunday.

friday: lots of laundry. homeschool. swimming. errands. lunch at sam's club. finished another fabelhaven book. pizza party with the Trader girls. getting good at homemade pizza thanks to Kate's class. laughed at dinner when Zack said, "HI PIZZA-- COME TO PAPA!" while opening his mouth wide. left the boys with their favorite babysitters and went on a date with Aaron. 15 minutes late to the movies. isn't meant to be that we see Time Traveler's Wife. walked the isles of Costco instead. bought new mascara. love it. rented 17 again. Zac Efron is seriously hot. invited the Trader girls to sleep over at our place. played charades and ate junk food until midnight.

saturday: early donut run with Keyonna and Sam. temple session with hubby at 9 am (and Azy and Chris.) almost fell asleep during the session-- but stayed focused. hairiest man alive helped me through the veil. lunch with the Goins. long afternoon nap. visited our new neighbors at their house with crystal doorknobs. grocery shopping. scrubbed the kitchen and cleaned out the fridge. early to bed. love saturdays.

sunday: woke up early. visiting teaching. made cinnamon rolls. listened to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir while peeling 100 potatoes. Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing is my favoritest song ever. fantastic Sacrament meeting. dressed up as Sister Friendly for the primary kids. had to change sharing time plans last minute. appreciate my sweet husband for helping me in the library. adore the children- especially my own. came home from church feeling uplifted. quickly threw dinner together. invited guests= new family in our ward+ Azy and Chris. enjoyed dessert a little too much. played games. called Grandmas, including our adopted one. read scriptures as a family. stayed up late with the kids laughing at baby pictures. felt baby #4 kick. think he might become a pro soccer player. talked with the husband long after the kids fell asleep. committed to a stricter budget. hate that there's 5 whole days until another weekend.