disturbing questions and emails

This post isn't going to be as interesting as the title sounds... just giving you a warning upfront.


For some time now, Zack has been asking some rather odd questions. They are so out of the blue and so far stretched that I can't seem to write them down fast enough. He usually wants to know what I would do in a life or death situation (it's the superhero in him, I'm sure.) A typical question goes like so: "Would you get your head chopped off my a helicopter propeller to save the whole world?" I should have nipped these in the bud when they started, but I can't help but ponder the question and then answer truthfully. Yes, it might be a little disturbing, but it's thought provoking and I just can't help but turn it into a discussion.

On our way back from the library yesterday, Zack proposed: "If you HAD to give away one of your kids forever, who would you give away?" The good motherly answer would have been: "I wouldn't give away ANY of you! I love you all too much!" But that's not what I said. I answered truthfully. If I HAD to give away one of my children, I would have to give away Simon. Sad, I know. But it's the truth. He's the youngest and will have very little memories of our family... and it would be less painful. After I answered, I asked Zack if he thought I would give him away and he said, "Well, I am cute, but I do make a lot of messes." Which really means, he asked because he wanted to know if he was cute enough to counter balance the mess-making. And he is.

The older boys are still emailing constantly. They usually send them to each other (and occationally to Daddy and the grandparents) but recently, I've been lucky enough to join in on the fun. Here are some from last month--- these were all sent on the same day.

*****

Hi Benny Boy.

I love that my oldest child has blue eyes and freckles. Did you know that when I was pregnant with you, I thought I would never have a blue-eyed baby? With dad's brown eyes, I thought he would dominate over me. But now we see who's the most powerfulest! Blue eyes rule!!!! Brown eyes drool!!!! (shh! don't tell Luke).

And just remember, when we play Rummikub, I will NEVER go easy on you. You have to win fair and square. Good luck, sucka!

Love,
Mom

*******

Hi Mom,

Thanks for the email. I dont need you to go easy on me. I can beat you in any game with a broken arm!

Love Ben

******

Dear adorable, squishy, large-headed Luke,

Guess what chicken butt? Simon is grumpy and doesn't like it when I email you. He's jealous of your large head.

Do you know who my favorite kid is? The one with brown eyes. (shh! don't tell Ben!)

Do you know what 500 X 5,678,456 is? if you know the answer, email me back. If you don't, you'll have to move out of our house by next Tuesday.

Love you,
Mom

******

Hi Mom,

the answer is 2839228000 you never said I couldnt use a cowcullator.

from luke

*****

Minutes after I sent them these emails, I overheard Ben say, "Hey! She told me the same thing!" Am I screwing up my kids? Probably. But we're having a good time in the process.

Yesterday we got an email from Aaron's mom that our boys loved. It's a ton of random "Did you know" facts. I will share a few of the kid's favorites. If you want the whole email, LMK. I am not a forwarding kind of girl, but if you want it, I will forward on :)