these hands

Our little girl has her hands in her mouth ALL DAY long. She tries very hard to suck her thumb, but she's not sure what to do with the other four fingers when her thumb is in her mouth and she often pokes herself in the eyes and scratches her chubby cheeks. And really, one finger just isn't good enough--- neither is five. She wants the entire fist, baby.

We've tried getting her on a pacifier, and she really does like it, but she can only keep it in her mouth for a minute before her fist knocks it out again. And nursing her is some kind of joke. The minute I get her hands out of the way to feed her, they magically appear again, right in her mouth. I literally have to tie her hands behind her back in order to get her to eat. But she doesn't like to be tied down, no she does not. She likes her hands accessible at all times. If she's wrapped like a burrito, she's crying.

I've started to realize that her hands are the reason she isn't getting any sleep. Even when she's extremely tired, she will wake herself up from a 5 minute nap to chew on her fists. It's been terribly frustrating. We've tried making her scream to sleep, but this baby will scream until the cows come home. We will literally have cows sitting in our living room with their hooves up on the recliner and this girl will still be screaming. She's a feisty little fighter. And I like her for it, but I just wished she'd sleep once in a while.

The last few days, we've forced her to sleep on her tummy and it's about the ONLY thing that will keep her hands out of her mouth... and I think it might be a good solution. I really need a solution to our sleeping problems.. I've been wondering if maybe she's uptight about something... if she's created this habit because she's nervous or anxious. But when my aunts came to visit, they brought me a DVD of her birth. It was amazing to watch. There were a lot of things I couldn't remember because it was such a difficult labor for me, but I learned so much about myself and about my little baby while watching it. One thing I was surprised to see is that the MINUTE she was born, her little hands were in her mouth. I thought she was hungry and I kept saying (even after I fed her) that she must be starving. But now I know it was a habit she developed in the womb.

I shouldn't be laughing about this (because it's NOT funny) but I was dilated to a 10 for FOUR HOURS and couldn't get her out because her little arm was up by her head. Thinking back to that struggle and knowing her personality now, I can guarantee you she was more concerned about doing HER THING. I can see her, in the birth canal, just chewing on her hands while I labored away. She is such a little stinker!

She has been a real challenge for me, but I have learned a lot over the past few months. Even though we've labeled her as our "worst baby" we still wouldn't trade her for the world.