you be the judge...

Aaron put on a vampire wig today (it's that time of year when costumes are abundant!) Ben took one look at him and exclaimed, "Hey! You look just like uncle Brett!" We had a good laugh over it and thought we'd share...

a quiet moment

My husband was playing volleyball late last night and just as I was about to fall asleep, Zack woke up. This is pretty unusual because Zack is a solid sleeper...always has been. But last night it seemed as though he was having nightmare. So I brought him back to bed with me and we laid next to each other without any movement or sound. We were both awake, looking at each other and it was such an incredible moment. As I was holding his hands and laying next to tiny body, I could feel his enormous Spirit. It was just a quiet moment, where I felt like what I am doing (as a mother) is so much more important than I even realize. He can only say a handful of words, yet this little guy has so much to look forward to... so much to accomplish in his life. And as his mom, I have a huge responsibility (and privilege) to teach him and love him and help him to become who he was destined to become. He is not a child, but a man, probably wiser and more mature than I am. And even though he seems so little right now, what he will accomplish and who he will become is greater than I can even comprehend. What a blessing it is to watch our children grow and develop. Today I am grateful to be a mother.

chicken and beef and bacon, oh my.

Tonight we spent a cool evening at Sonic. It wasn't the best idea with our crazy little one running all over the place, but no one actually ran him over, so it was a success. While we were sitting outside eating ice cream cones, Ben and Luke started a wonderfully disgusting talk about slaughtering animals and eating their meat. Here are a few excerpts from their conversation.

Ben: The best way to eat two animals is a bacon burger- so you can eat a cow and a pig at the same time.
Luke: Whoa. that would be really cool.

Luke: If you take a really big turkey and chop it up into small pieces, do you call it turkey nuggets?
Ben: I don't know. probably.

And my favorite...
Luke: Why aren't any hamburgers at Chick-fil-a?
Ben: Duh, Luke. If there was, it would be called Cow-fil-a.

Who would have guessed they have such interest in meat? Aaron and I sat back and smiled while they chatted away. It's SO much fun to hear them go back and forth. Lately, I am turning down the radio in the car so I can listen to their conversations in the back seat. Very entertaining. Yesterday, I heard Ben explain to Luke that they should like girls, but only as much as they like their friends. Then Luke said, "Yeah. I only like girls a little bit, but I like our mom really, really much." He got to stay up past his bedtime for that comment.

it's still summer, right?

It does not seem like OCTOBER! we had dinner (taco bell) at the park and stayed until the sun set. Luke was wearing a sleeveless t-shirt. We played freeze tag in our bare feet and came home for rootbeer floats. sounds like a summer night to me.

Remembering Roma

October 1, 1914- March 3, 2003
My grandma wasn’t famous. She was never on the cover of a magazine or the author of a best-seller. In the world’s eyes, she probably didn’t accomplish a lot in her lifetime. But she left a legacy to her family. She had 6 children, 48 grandchildren, 100+ greats (and still counting.)
She lived 20 years as a widow, struggled with depression, and didn’t have a glamorous lifestyle. But her life WAS rich. She was spunky, energetic, and had a charismatic laugh. She could bust-a-move on the dance floor unlike any other 80 year old woman. She loved music, quilting, and most of all-- her family. She was very involved with all of her grandchildren and was a part of all major events in our lives. When she died, each of us mentioned that we thought we were her favorite. (truth be told, I really was. jk☺) Hours after Ben was born, she was next to my bed at the hospital sharing her experiences as a mother. Through her memories, I learned to love her parents and my grandpa, who died when I was 4 years old. As a young girl, I was enthralled with the pictures and stories of her past. I spent school breaks, summer vacation and long weekends at her home...playing games, sewing and sleeping next to her in her bed. These are the memories I cherish.

During the last days of her life, she was surrounded by her children and grandchildren. The nurses at the hospital couldn’t believe how many people fit into her room. I will never forget the day I said goodbye to my beautiful grandma. There were probably 40 others in the room, all singing hymns and reminiscing about our favorite lady. Luke was only a few weeks old. I was a busy mother of two babies, in the middle of my last semester at BYU…just trying to graduate. My grandma was very sick, and we made the effort to go and say goodbye, although we didn’t expect to get a response from her. We held her hands and told her how much we loved her and how much we would miss her. She smiled and tried to get out words, but it was a struggle. Just as I was about to leave, she squeezed my hand and asked, “Janet, how is school going?” I wanted to tell her how hard it was for me and how insane I was for trying to graduate with a newborn. But I couldn't respond. I just squeezed her hand and wiped away my tears. In the middle of everything, she was aware of my circumstances and cared about what was going on in my life. That means the world to me.

I believe that she is still very involved in my life. Many times, when I have felt lonely or discouraged, I imagine her looking down on me, cheering me on, telling me I can get through it. She didn’t live an easy life by any means, but she never gave up. She was firm in her testimony and not embarrassed to share it with others. She was courageous, strong and determined. I want to pass on her legacy of love to my children and grandchildren and hope to become half the woman she was. I love you, Roma, and I am thinking of you on your birthday. Happy Day!