Chile Chili Chilly

So....  my parents get home in 9 days.  They've been serving a mission in Concepcion, Chile for 18 months.  The last time they saw Simon, he was Roma's age.  They've never met my baby girl.

The kids and I will be there for their homecoming.  And this is very unfortunate timing for Aaron because it means we will spend our first Halloween apart.  He's put up with my shenanigans for a decade, it's about time he gets a break.  I am super sad we will be apart, he is not.

We decided to do Simon's birthday party before Halloween... because it will be crazy when we get back and because he will NOT stop talking about it.  It's been three weeks of nonstop birthday party talk.  It will be simple, of course.  I love parties, but I do not go all out.  We invite friends over, play games, have cupcakes and call it a party.  That will happen on Friday and then we will head to Utah to trick or treat with cousins...  not excited for the cold, the weather here is perfection.  but there are only a few yellow and red leaves to remind us it's Fall.

Roma is walking to and from people, but nothing else.  She is super stubborn and sassy.  We love her anyway.

Motherhood is calling.  beds to make and breakfast to serve.  I really, really like my job.

the weekend (pictures later)

Friday

• laundry day.  all the sheets, towels and rugs clean.
• organize Ro's massive piles of clothes.  make a bigger mess than I started with.
• Deb, Brent and girls stop by on their way home from Disney.  one night sleepover again.
• Keyonna comes to crash too.  party!
• cancelled our plans to go to the hockey game
• pile up in the Shumwagon and hit Bellagio instead.  fountains = our favorite visitor spot in Vegas
• stop by Glaziers on the way home for dessert
• tried to convince the adults to go dancing. Deb's not a party animal like she used to be.  Aaron said he'll go another night with me.  I will hold him to it.  
• stay up late talking anyway.  Love my sis.

Saturday

• waffles for breakfast.  12 million kids were at my table.. or so it seemed.  
• cousins left, but not before Deb waxes my eyebrows
• pick up Nat, Jane and kids for Spring Mountain Ranch
• always a good time with my lady-friends.  the kids have a blast at the lake.  Simon strips down to his underwear (of course.)
• drop off the older boys at home, wrap a cute pink gift.
• Aaron, Keyonna, Simon, Ro and I hit a baby shower for Aaron's co-workers.  Two men who are having a daughter through a surrogate.
• most entertaining conversation I've ever had at a baby shower.  So interested in the process.  Gay men are the best conversationalists.  
• Cafe Rio on the way home for dinner.  heart to heart with K.
• Boys attend Primary practice while we're away.  Thanks Jane for picking them up and bringing them home.
• yardwork.. never ends.
• played Rummikub with boys and KeyKey.  Aaron always wins.
• Date to the grocery store, just my man and me.  we stroll the isles.  pick up food for Sunday's meal. and some eggnog.
• rent Bernie (with Jack Black) on a whim.  watch 1/2 of it before we fall asleep.  funny and way weird.

Sunday

• haircuts for all 5 boys.  I know better than to wait until Sunday morning. but they went relatively smooth.  Trimmed Ro's mullet.  
• Texting with the Bishopric during their meeting.. while giving haircuts.  Multitasking at it's finest.
• ward party on then off then on again.  Whip up fliers to take to church.  and a food sign up sheet.
• quick shower.  hair damp but not wet.  makeup on the drive to church.
• get to sacrament meeting 30 minutes early.  best seats for the program.  make copies of the fliers.
• talk to the sister missionaries for a while.  love them.
• tears during the kids' songs and testimony.  Miss our old primary faces.  Miss our old ward.
• Roma poops up her back during the meeting.  Able to get her to the bathroom before it gets on any of her clothes.  I am a miracle worker.  #imusthave5kids
• Give the boys hugs after the program, off to classes.
• contention during RS lesson.  it's gonna take a while for our wards to mesh...  baby steps.
• big meal after church.  love my boys for knowing how to cook.  they baked the ham, wrapped and cooked the potatoes, microwaved the peas, made the kool-aid and set champaign glasses for our traditional Sunday toast.  love them.
• 15 minute nap before visits.
• Aaron has meetings at the church.
• call grandparents
• scripture study and FHE lesson with our boys.  never enough time on Mondays.
• two chapters of Phantom Tollbooth.
• early bedtime for the kids.  late for the parents... I started going through an old box of notes and pictures.  bad idea.  but went to sleep in a great mood.

Monday

• 1/2 mile run with the kids.  Ro in the wagon.  Simon runs 1/4 mile without stopping.  Ben breaks his 4 minute record.
• quick shower.  no makeup.
• drop the babies off at Jane's.
• carpool.  parent teacher conference at the school.  both teachers.  both positive.
• left wondering why my kids are in school.
• pick up kids at Jane's.  head straight to a presidency meeting.
• lots of stuff to cover.  need to fill callings in a major way. 
• talk to Michelle.  give her directions to my house.
• RS phone calls.
• two visits with sisters in our ward.  love the social part of this calling.
• make bread bowls and soup.  creamy broccoli and cauliflower. no recipe.
• Jane calls and picks up a few items at the store.  I made bread bowls for her and she makes another pot of soup for our dinner guests.  more to choose from.
• whip up some pumpkin bread with Simon while the oven is on.
• Invite Azy for dinner too.  The more the merrier.
• Mich, B and Oliver arrive.  DIE over this cute boy. 
• Aze, Chris and boys arrive.  Love this fam.  Feels like HS again.
• no pumpkin carving.  too much talking.  kids play upstairs anyway.
• 10 pm bedtime. 
• stay up to blog, read about the debate.  Will watch it tomorrow.

my five little people

Roma's picture finally made it to the side bar! Newsflash, I have five kids.  Time to do a quick update.

Benjamin 

11 years and 3 months old

.Ben continues to amaze us with his mature personality and responsible attitude.  He is excited about being a BOY SCOUT in a major way and has earned his first two merit badges before coming a tenderfoot.  (as if I know that that means.)  He loves doing homework and is building a massive savings account.  He won't spend money on anything.  Whatever task you give this kid, he gets it done... and fast!  He has always been so neat and clean, but recently I've noticed he's more focused on being quick than he is about being organized.  A few days ago, I sat down with him to have a light-hearted conversation about his messy dresser and the amount of clothes that aren't getting put in the hamper.  After our talk, he rushed upstairs to clean up and a minute later I found him in his room, lying face down on his bed crying about it.  I felt terrible (but was more surprised than anything because he doesn't cry often.)  I rubbed his back and asked him if everything was okay and he said, "I feel so bad, I didn't even know I was becoming messier."  I laughed (quietly) and told him about the time he was 4 and cut the screen to the sliding glass door.  He bawled about it all day and I couldn't punish him because he'd already punished himself.  We laughed and then went in the kitchen to make waffles for breakfast.  While cooking I told him I felt bad for him that he was my guinea pig... I have done a lot of parental experimenting on him over the years and he's taken it in stride.  He is growing into a young man and I couldn't be more proud.  Love my Benny boy!

Luke

9 years and 8 months old

Luke is my side-kick during the day while Ben and Zack are at school.  He spends his time reading (2-3 hours a day), playing the piano (1-2 hours a day) and working on some kind of art project, origami animal or lego village.  He is in the process of making a book of all 50 state flags and so far it's amazing.  He always keeps himself busy and never bothers me.. ever.  That's why I keep him home all day!  He is the ultimate helper with Simon and Ro and loves to get them dressed, play a game or take them for a quick wagon ride around the block. Our favorite dates together are to the library or Michael's craft. Luke is such a creative guy and is growing up way too quickly.  

Zack

6 years and 9 months old

Zack Attack has mellowed out by leaps and bounds.  I've seen a huge change in him since Roma arrived.  He is helpful and sweet and loves his baby sister.  He can still play his spaz card and we love it when Wacky Zacky comes to play!  He's not a fan of chores, but will work as long as there's music and other people involved.  He is the first person to wake up every morning and usually has his lunch made and his backpack on long before it's time to go to school.  He loves his teacher (Ms. Luke) but let's face it, he's really there for he social interaction... recess, PE, and lunch are what keeps his motor running.  We have major issues with the amount of things he keeps in "special spots" around the house.  Zack will hold on to everything he's ever made, anything he's ever looked at and of course, all of the gifts he's ever been given. I have the hardest time parenting Zack, but really he's a sweetheart.  The other day he left on a bike ride with his friends.  To my surprise, he came bounding in the front door a minute later.  I asked him what was wrong and he said, "nothing.  I just forgot to give you a hug and tell you goodbye."  He gets off the hook all the time because he's so sweet.  #watchoutladies #player 

Simon

2 years and 11 months old

This boy has a birthday coming up and he could not be more excited for his Avengers party.  He is a little man trapped in a three year old's body.  He talks nonstop all day long and I love it.  He makes dinner with me every night and loves to help with chores.  Only problem is he makes a bigger mess while cleaning/cooking, but I am hopeful he will get it one of these days.  As long as you talk to him and treat him like an adult, he's a happy camper.  A boy in the carpool likes to tease him that he's little and it absolutely drives Simon crazy.  If he wasn't buckled in his carseat, I guarantee you a fight would break out.. don't mess with the little big boy.  He's shows me how TALL and strong he is about 20 times a day.  One of his biggest concerns is that he's going to grow so big he will break our house... he will often have nightmares that he grows so big he can't fit in our car or house.  Of course, I think it's hilarious he stresses about getting too big.  I could not survive a day without this charming little boy of mine.  

Roma

1 year and 18 days old

Roma and I have a love/hate relationship.  I love her to pieces, but I am not her favorite person and she lets me know, often.  She's a tomboy and would much rather wrestle with her brothers on the floor than cuddle.  She is sassy and silly and screams when she doesn't get her own way.  She loves to be outside, preferably in the wagon or at the park.  She knows what she wants and is pretty good and letting us know when and where to take her (she points and grunts all day long).  She will say a handful of words (dada, Luute, mama, deeee for drink, and she also says the names of her two best friends Jane and Katie, who are both older than mom.)  She is a social butterfly and loves to look people in the eyes and have conversations with them.  Her all time favorite buddy is Zack and she will go to him anywhere, as long as he carries her (no walking yet.)  The other day, Zack was making her laugh while I was holding her.  I giggled too because her laugh was so darling.  She looked at me, stopped laughing and slapped me in the face as if to say, "you're not a part of this conversation."  Which made me laugh harder, but she was seriously mad at me. It's the weirdest thing to explain, but sometimes I feel like I am carrying around a midget woman on my hip. I love her zest for life and her ability to speak her mind even though she can't speak at all!  Can't wait to watch her grow and learn.  Toddlers are my favorite!! 

Atlanta dating disaster -- summer of '99

This portion of our "love story" is NOT mentioned in the original post because it's a novel in and of itself.  It's long and frustrating, but is an important part of our history so I am including it now. warning-- I am writing this late at night.  sorry in advance for typos and mistakes.

My husband and I had a great start and could have been inseparable from the minute we met.  I liked him from day one and knew he was the kind of guy I wanted to introduce to my parents.  I told him that I liked him, flirted with him and wanted him to take me out on a second date.  He not believe me when I said I liked him (he truly thought I said that to everyone), he interpreted my flirtiness as friendliness, and he did not ask me on a second date.  Instead  he asked my friend and next door neighbor on a date, to a concert I had been dying to see and could not get tickets to.  He kissed this girl a few days later and it crushed me.  When their whirlwind of a relationship was over, I pretended like I was okay with being his friend and even convinced myself that he wasn't my type.  But truthfully, I realized then that we had major communication issues.  He is not a verbal communicator, and I am an extremely intense verbal communicator.  We are like magnets that repel each other when it comes to talking about important issues.  This is a major conflict in our marriage and it was apparent almost immediately after we met.  

In a communications class, a few months after Aaron asked out my friend instead of me, I was assigned to write a paper on a relationship with conflict.  Most of my friends were writing about a female/frienemy.  I had no communication issues with other women, instead, I had this awkward relationship with this awesome guy.  I liked him and I thought he liked me back, but we could never be on the same page at the same time.  Writing the paper was frustrating because we had a fun relationship-- we could talk but only about things that didn't matter.. random topics, funny stories, television shows, etc.  But whenever I tried to talk serious, it would backfire on me.  By the end of our our first year when we said goodbye (for good, or so I thought) we both wrote meaningful letters that admitted we loved each other, but neither of us has never said those words (or even gotten close to them) when speaking face to face.  Kinda sweet... but so frustrating!

That summer, I went to live with my sisters in Atlanta with their young families.  I didn't ever expect to hear from Aaron again, but he got my number from my mom (remember, she loves him) and called me my first week out there.  We talked on the phone all summer but never (not once) about anything important or meaningful.  I often wanted to bring up the fact that he never asked me out on a second date.  I wanted to ask him why he kept calling me and tell him how hurt I was when he dated my friend.  I tried, but it never happened.  At the end of the summer, he told me he had purchased a plane ticket to Atlanta to attend the wedding of our mutual friends.  I was thrilled!  He would be spending 5 days with me and my sisters and then we would go to the wedding together on the last day before he flew out.  I took off work, cleared everything from my scheduled and planned 5 days of non-stop fun.

The day before he came, he called me to confirm.  He told me that the groom would be picking him up from the airport and then he would call me after that.  I was a little disappointed because I wanted to spend the entire time with him, but then I wondered if I was assuming too much (I had done that before with him and it wasn't good.)  So I downplayed it on the phone and said, "Okay, whatever.  That sounds fine.  Just call me when you can."  The next day he flew in, hung out with his friends and then never called.... not the next day or the next or the next.  My schedule was completely EMPTY and I was literally just waiting for him to call me.  (this was before the day of cell phones when you could just text someone casually.. I had no number for him which was super annoying.)  I felt really stupid for assuming that he flew out to see me and hang out with me.

On day 4 he finally called.  He was totally upbeat on the phone and said he flew in and decided to help them with wedding prep and didn't have a chance to call me.  I tried to act okay about it too and wondered if I could still see him before he flew out.  He said that he had lunch free after the wedding and before the reception if I wanted to meet up.  I did.  I picked him up at the temple and we had lunch.  It was lighthearted and fun and we didn't talk about anything important..  but inside, I was DYING.  I was mad and hurt and so annoyed that I couldn't read him.  After lunch we drove to my sisters home and I introduced him to my nieces and nephews.  He was SO CUTE with the twin babies, I almost started crying.  Everything is great about this guy except for the fact that I can't talk to him!!!

At 2 PM, he casually tells me that the wedding reception ends at 3 PM.  I had no idea it was an afternoon reception and freaked out because it was TWO HOURS away from where we were.  We hopped in the car and started driving.  Before we got on the freeway, I was so frustrated, I just let loose and asked him a bazilion questions: Why didn't he tell me what time the reception started/ended?  Why didn't he want me to pick him up from the airport?  Why did he make we wait 4 long days before he called?  He answered them in stride and told me that I didn't sound excited enough on the phone.  I was always so bubbly and happy, but when he told me he was coming out to see me, I didn't act like I cared.  I explained that I was trying to downplay it because I was a little too excited.  He told me he'd landed and basically been a third wheel to this poor couple about to get married.. and that he'd done nothing for 4 days..  such a frustrating, but eye-opening conversation.  And that was only the first ten minutes of the drive.  The rest of the two hours we covered our history-- why he didn't ask me out (he was intimidated by my confidence).  I told him now devastated I was when he started dating my friend.. how I went home for the week because I couldn't stand seeing them together.  He explained that he broke up with her because he realized how much he liked me, but then I wouldn't give him the time of day (my confidence was covering up my insecurities..) After 18 months of knowing one another, this was our first real conversation.  Minutes before we arrived at the reception, he told me that wanted our relationship to be more than a friendship and that he could really see us together.  I loved hearing it and was so excited for the drive home!!!

At the reception (where the bride and groom had left before we arrived) we helped clean up the decorations.  Well, I cleaned up while Aaron played with the massive amount of kids running around.  He was in the middle of 20 little girls.. giving them piggy back rides, swinging them around in their pretty dresses, chasing and making them scream, etc.  I watched him from afar and knew he was the kind of father I wanted for my children.  I was going to tell him that on the drive home.  But before we got in the car, a friend of the groom (who I had never met before) asked Aaron if he could ride the 2 hours back with us, sleep at my sisters home and then catch a ride to the airport in the morning.  Aaron, being the awesome guy that he is, said yes.  I was so annoyed.

The 2 hour drive home was spent listening to our new "friend" talk about himself.  He blabbed the entire time.  I was literally going batty.  Aaron never said a word, not to me, not to the other guy. (*But when we stopped for gas and I got out to pay, he would not let me put in my credit card.  I was mad and insisted, and we got into an argument at the pump.  Ultimately Aaron won and I still think about that fight at the gas station with fondness.  He is such a gentleman and always takes charge.)  Now, back to the story... We arrived home at my sisters house at the same time the pizza delivery guy was dropping off their dinner (another frustration, we had their only car and totally ruined my sister's plans.  They needed to pick up their other car at the mechanic and grocery shop, but because our plans changed, so did theirs.  We left them home without a car and without any food in their fridge.  This added to my frustration...)  Anyway, this dude ate all my sisters pizza with his mouth open.  She kept looking at me wondering who he was and I could only roll my eyes.  She took me aside and told Aaron and I to go upstairs while she occupied him.  We gladly accepted.

I needed to change the sheets on my king size bed so Aaron and his friend could use it (instead of the twin bed in the other room where Aaron was planning to sleep.)  Aaron helped me but didn't say a word about the change of plans or the guy who was now ruining our night.  I tried to small-talk, but it didn't work.  Neither of us knew how to get back to the romantic can of worms we opened up in the car on the drive to the reception.  After some time, my sister and this annoying guy came to join us.  My sister was laughing and told me she couldn't keep him downstairs any longer.  The four of us had an interesting conversation.  My sister was telling them how I had made a lot of friends (as a waitress) and how the missionaries loved me because I was getting a lot of referrals from people I had met.  Missionary work was exciting to me and it was the focus of my summer.  Aaron asked if I planned on going on a full-time mission and I said absolutely. Then, this guy, who had met me only a few hours earlier, told me that I was not the kind of girl that served a mission and he could never see me out in the mission field.  I was so offended and beyond annoyed.  Aaron, instead of contradicting his friend, agreed.  Aaron says now that he stated he didn't want me to serve a mission, but that was not how I interpreted it.  I told them that it had been a long day and I was going to sleep in the other room.  The night was over.

After everyone was in bed, I snuck downstairs and called my mom.  She was so anxious to hear how the day had gone.  I told her it was a disaster, but that I was looking forward to dropping off his friend at the airport in the morning and then talking to Aaron for a few hours before his plane left.  I was so grateful there were a couple of hours in between their flights!  I wanted to clean the air and (at least) finish our conversation.  My mom was disappointed that the day/week hadn't gone well, but she was sure things would turn out okay before he flew home.

The next morning, I woke up early, took my brother-in-law to the mechanic to get his car, came home and showered and got ready, drove my sister and her kids to church, and came back before Aaron and his buddy had even gotten out of bed.  They grabbed a banana as we loaded their luggage in the car and we were off to the airport.  Conversation to the airport was almost nonexistent.  I was not mad, but I also didn't want to talk their ears off.  Aaron barely said two words. (now I know he doesn't talk before 10 AM.)  I pulled up to the passenger drop off lane, intending to ditch this guy and drive somewhere else with Aaron-- we had 3 hours to spare and I wanted to go to a park or get something to eat or whatever... even just stay in the car and talk.  But as I got out of the car to help open the trunk for the luggage, Aaron grabbed his bag and gave me a side hug and said, "Thanks. and maybe we'll see you later."  I stood there completely stunned, probably with my jaw dropped.  I said goodbye shortly and drove away..  I blasted the music and said out loud, "I will never see him again."  If we couldn't make it work on vacation, we couldn't make it work anywhere.  He was a good friend and it had to stay that way.  (Aaron's side of the story is that I pulled up in the passenger drop off lane without telling him that I wanted to talk to him.  and he didn't want to say anything because I already seemed annoyed from the night before.  and knowing him now and how he deals with conflict, this totally makes sense.  He will not push issues unless it's the right time to talk about it.  when is the right time?  never.)

A week later, he emailed and apologized for whatever happened, although neither of us could really explain what it was.  I was not going to ruin the friendship with my favorite guy over this, but this trip was the very reason I wouldn't give him the time of day a few months later (see porch scene in "our love story")  Looking back, it's very frustrating from both sides.  Aaron didn't know how to read me and so he avoided talking to me.  I hate when people avoid talking so I get more annoyed!  I want to punch it out and get everything on the table.  If someone can't handle talking, they can't handle me.  We could not be more different.... and 12 years later, we still have arguments (or lack of any conversation at all) because neither of us understand where the other person is coming from.  SO frustrating..  but we always find a way to work it out because what we have together is SO worth it.

good thursday

warning: long meaningless entry..

I woke up at 5:30 and put on my fave workout outfit and hit the streets.  I ran to our family vacation soundtrack and because it was dark and I was alone, I danced/skipped more than I ran.  As the sun came up over the desert my heart filled with gratitude for all the good things in my life.  my family and friends were at the top of the list. but more than anything, I felt so much joy to have good health.  I felt strong and alive and content.  The sunrise literally filled up the entire sky and I was reconnected to the powerhouse spirit inside that often gets overshadowed by tasks and errand running and laundry.

I came home, kissed my husband who was still asleep, showered, put on a real outfit and makeup and made waffles for my darlings.  Simon insisted on having a pancake instead (I did promise him last night, but what's the diff?) I put one pancake on the stove while I used up the rest of the batter in the waffle maker and forgot about it, of course.  Our house smelled like burnt pancakes all day. Luke kept saying it reminded him of camping and that made me smile because it was a good kind of burnt smell.  The kind that makes you wonder if you own a woodburning stove or roast chestnuts.

I took the carpool to Blue Diamond and was reminded (again) of the beauty that surrounds us everyday.  The beauty was louder than the kids in my car and the Halloween tunes we were jamming to.  I was counting my blessings.  We played at the park for a minute and walked to Jane's house to return a pair of Batman underwear.  Simon had to borrow it last week when he soaked while dancing in the rain.  (and came home in only a pair of underwear, which was not unusual at all.)  Simon went to preschool at Jamie's and could not have been more excited about it.  He wore a pair of sunglasses and bounced when he walked up to the door.  His body looks like a teenagers and he's not even three yet.

Luke, Ro and I vacuumed out the big van at the gas station.  Best 8 quarters I've ever spent.  Then we hit the library because we had nothing else to do and that's our go-to place when there's down time.  I read through a recipe book and got excited for fall cooking.  On the way home we hit the grocery store for a few veggies.  Roma was so lonely driving around in the double seated grocery cart car.  At one point Luke tried to climb in with her and he got stuck.  It was awesome and if I hadn't been so busy trying to pull him out, I would have snapped a picture.  Since when did he become daddy long legs?

We picked up Simon on the way home and he blabbed all the way out to the car, "I like school.  But I have to sit down and be quiet and not talk that much."  These were new rules for him.  I would never enforce them at home because his voice is my favorite.

We made lunch at home.  Turkey sandwiches and left over lasagna for Luke.  Then we read stories before nap time.  Luke is on his 6th chapter book this week.. I believe that's a record for him.  While the kids were napping/reading, I decided to mop the kitchen floor and get prepped for dinner.  While mopping, I listened to a relationships DVD by John Gottman that I came across at the library.  I liked it.  The therapist talked about his own marriage problems even though he does marriage therapy for a living.  He said his wife always says to him, "If your clients could only hear you now" when they're in the middle of a fight.  He also said that during his seminars he always uses a recent fight between he and his wife for an example.  I love that.  It convinced me that I need to document some classic arguments Aaron have gotten into.  I might start on one tonight if Aaron doesn't get home from basketball soon.  I have a hard time falling asleep without him...

Jane picked up the boys after school and took all four of them to her house to do crafts..  And then Katie came over to drop off a game and took Roma back to her house.  I didn't know what to do with myself!  I blasted Christmas music (Martina McBride) and finished vacuuming...  Dinner prep was long, but we had time and the rest of the house was clean.  chicken noodle soup, homemade rolls and a fresh salad. The boys played while I set the table which hasn't happened in a long time, but it was nice.  Aaron picked up the baby on his way home from work and was super impressed with the spotless house.  That's what can happen when kids aren't around, yo.

I quickly ate dinner and ran to the church for 3 hours of RS business, new callings and VT assignments.  Aaron put the kids to bed and came to the church to play basketball.  We crossed paths in the hall and gave each other a high five.  I rushed home to 5 sleeping babies.

Now I am all cuddled up in bed.. the windows are open and Christmas music is playing (Michael Buble).  I never listen to Christmas music this early, but I'm getting pumped up for my entire family together this year.  It's been a long time since I've seen my parents.  I've never gone this long before... I can't believe they've never seen my baby.  She's almost not a baby anymore.  Which reminds me, I should stop blabbing and add her picture to my sidebar.  After a year+ I think she's officially earned a spot in our family.  Here I go!