big fatty

There's nothing like a smart-alec three year old to boost your spirits. Today Zack has been referring to me as "The Big Fat Mommy." When he first said it, everyone busted up-- because he seriously pulled it out of nowhere. And he knows when something gets a laugh, it should be repeated over and over and over. I am fully aware that this video is dark and lame-- but it is what it is. I was too fat and lazy to turn on the light and figured his voice is cute enough to document.

Zack keeps us on our toes and never slows down. Sometimes I wonder WHERE he gets all his energy. His favorite past-time is jumping on the trampoline. But even when he's in the house or buckled in his seat belt, he's still bouncing. He always has a smile on his face and literally skips everywhere he goes.

When cousins were here over the 4th of July, Aaron and I had to drive two separate cars to the park. Because I had most of the car seats in the van I told Aaron to take the three big kids. Apparently, Zack overheard my directions and once we were buckled in our seat belts, he gave me quite the lecture.

Zack: "Hey mom! I am not a little kid anymore."
Me: "I never said you were little"
Zack: "Well you told Dad to take the big kids, but I have to ride in your car."
Me: "Well, Daddy is driving the three older kids, but that doesn't mean you're little."
Zack: "I'm not. Because I am three. Then I will turn four. Then I will turn five. See? That's NOT little." (holding up his fingers to prove his point.)

He is obsessed with numbers lately. He constantly rates how much he loves things. If we had a good time at the pool, he will say, "That was as fun as a SIX!" or he will whisper that he loves me a FOUR. When I responded that four isn't very much, he makes sure to point out that it IS a lot- because he is only three and four is more than three. I guess a year older than your age is always a lot. My 30th is approaching soon and that is a big number (for me, anyway.)

He is also on this counting kick. If I ask him to do something, he will say. "Yes. But I need to count to five and then I will [put away my toys]." Eventually he realized that counting to five didn't prolong the task long enough so he will say, "First I will count to six, then I will count to nine, then I will count to four, then I will brush my teeth." At least he's getting his numbers down. He's still working on the first ten letters of the alphabet.

The other night (Sunday to be exact) we were playing the game of Life as a family. I love that my kids are old enough to play along with me. Ben and Luke have been excellent gamers for a couple of years now and Zack is finally starting to play along. He was totally into the marriage/family/having babies aspect of Life. He was anxiously awaiting to get hitched and when he finally did, Ben told him to put a pink girl in his car. Zack looked shocked and announced, "I will marry her, but I have to kiss her first!!" He took his little blue man out of the car and affectionately put their tiny heads together and was satisfied. He proceeded along in the game only to have four daughters. Every time he had another girl, he would moan and say, "There's no other boys in my car! No fair!" Finally, someone who understands what I am going through.

Ben won the game-- with over a million dollars. That game is so inflated! What is becoming of our culture/obsession with money? The new version has several places to sue other players, a place on the game board to win $100,000 from an "Idol" contest, and every time you do something nice for a charity or have another child, you get $30,000. Ain't nobody throwing out 30 grand when our baby is born. No fair! Luke had to take a bathroom break and so Ben spun for him in his absence. When he returned, Ben announced he had bad news. #1 Luke lost his job as a doctor. #2 he had a daughter. Girls get such a bad rap at this house.

Later that night, I was tucking them into bed. Ben had obviously been giving lots of thought to his victory in the game of Life. He said ever so seriously, "Mom, I just really want to grow up and have a good job." I told him that he should save all his money for college and try to study hard. Then he sighed and said, "Well, I want a job where I don't have to a lot of work, but I still get paid a ton of money." Wouldn't we all. I went to bed feeling a bit disturbed. Kids these days... they think the world should be handed to them for nothing. I think we will move to a farm and show him what HARD work really is.