emotionally spent

tomorrow afternoon I am teaching a blogging class to a small group of women. I should have spent some time preparing a handout or getting my thoughts together or at least getting caught up on my own blog. I feel a bit odd getting in front of anyone and talking about my passion for blogging and journaling when I've been so sporadic lately. it has definitely not been on the top of my priority list as of late. Aaron took a short trip to Reno for work and I've been single-mommin'-it and I'm exhausted. But truth be told, I am exhausted even when he's around, so what's new.

We ran a few errands tonight before Aaron's flight landed. Dollar Tree, Petco and Target... wowza. By the time Daddy joined us for dinner at In-n-Out, everyone was on their worst behavior. Ro was sleepy. Simon got an entire page of stickers stuck in his hair. Luke was teasing Zack, which prompted him to shoot his newly purchased dart gun instead of eating dinner. Ben spilled ketchup right in the middle of the floor in front of the garbage can and then he stepped in it. I swear everyone was looking at us and counting our kids. I should have made a nice dinner for Aaron to come home to but I felt like getting out. I should have known better. I didn't ask Aaron if he was happy to see us because I was afraid of what his answer would be.

As you can tell from last night's late night post, I feel a little overwhelmed. Sometimes I feel crazy. Crazy for having this many kids and even crazier for wanting more. But the past couple of days I've had meaningful, uplifting conversations with my sweetest friend Jane. When talking with her (even when I spend the entire time venting my frustrations) I always come away feeling better about myself and about life because she has the best outlook on life. Most of you know Jane's history and losing her baby boy back in January. She recently miscarried and my heart is broken for her. Tonight she shared her thoughts on her blog and I am not the least bit surprised by her uplifting and positive attitude about her experiences. You can read her entry HERE. I am blessed to have friends in my life that make me a better person just by being around them. My neighborhood is literally filled with caring loving women who want to serve and love one another. It's a fabulous thing to behold.

ending this early because it's time to go to sleep and well, I am spent. Goodnight!