This or that? Lighthearted comparisons.

To compare or not to compare. That is the daily battle of most women. Why do we add stress to our lives by making constant comparisons? No matter where we turn someone is always doing/being something better than we are. Their house is cleaner, their jeans are smaller, their kids are better behaved, they seem to have it more together, they have more comments on their blog, etcetera, etcetera. The past few months (after reading my favorite book that I never talk about because it means too much and I would talk too long about it) I have found myself comparing less and life is definitley less complicated.

However, the past week or so, my boys conversations revolve around comparisons. It's not so much that they aren't as good as someone else, but they are really analyzing everything in general-- wanting to know if it's better and why. This is new for them (I think) and may have been triggered by the recent election talk. It's definitely taken a new spin on the things said at our house. Every time I turn around my kids are talking about who sees farther, who runs fastest, freckles or no freckles, which child is better behaved, who eats the most dinner. At first I was thinking it was a solely a boy/competitive thing.. but I think it's more than that. It's like a whole new way to have a conversation. Let me share a few of their discussions, so you get an idea. These have all happened in the past week... and I am telling you, is a small percentage of their non stop comparisons.


Situation 1: How many stairs will make you happy?

Ben asks the family WHICH HOUSE we like the best. The one we're living in or our smaller townhouse we just moved from. I would think it would be an easy question.. with no discussion needed, but I was wrong.

Ben: Are you guys glad we moved?
Me: How could you say that? Everything about this house is nicer than our other place.
Ben: Yeah, I think I like this house better, but I am just not sure.
Me: We have so much more room and we can paint the walls and make it OURS.
Luke: Well, the other house had 16 steps and this house only has 15. So not everything is better about it.
Aaron and I looked at each other and tried not to laugh while they kept talking... Luke is a numbers man. If one stair was going to make him happier, than maybe we should have stayed.


Situation 2: Which food is higher on the "healthy" scale?
(this is a conversation that happens almost at every meal, but here are a few examples..)

While eating at Cafe Rio:
Luke: What is more healthy, the strawberry or the cheese quesadilla?
Me: Um. probably the strawberry.
Ben: What? I thought the strawberry was the dessert!
Me: well, it's a fruit. The cheese quesadilla is a good source of protein, but it has fat too.
Luke: So which one should I eat first? (not stressing about it, just wondering for future eating habits :)
Me: It probably doesn't matter. You need to eat them both.
Ben: What he means is, if you had to chose only ONE to eat for the rest of your life, which one should he chose?
Me: I don't know. Maybe the quesadilla ?
Luke: I would chose the strawberry.
Ben: Me too.

A typical dinner question:
Ben: Which is more healthy CHICKEN or TURKEY?
Me: Um, I don't know. It depends on what part of the turkey or chicken you were eating.
Ben: Well, I think turkey is better because a whole holiday was named after it.


Situation 3: If you could color your wife what would she look like?

In the car, the boys were having a FULL BLOWN discussion on what they want their future wife to look like. This is HUGE for my boys because I wasn't sure they knew girls existed. This was what I overheard in the back seat:

Luke: Do you like brown or blue eyes?
Ben: Blue because I have blue. Don't you wish your eyes were blue?
Luke: Yeah, probably. But I like green too.
Ben: Well what color of hair do you like for girls?
Luke: I don't know. What do you like?
Ben: I think black hair is the prettiest. But I like red and brown too.
Zack: (Screaming) I like blonde hair! I like blonde hair!
Luke: (laughing) Zack likes blondes. But what color of eyes do you want, Zack? Blue?
Zack: Not blue. Light blue. Light blue. I have light blue.
Me: He thinks you're talking about what color of eyes HE has.. not want he wants in a wife.
Ben: yeah. I don't think he wants a wife, yet.
Me: Do you?
Ben: No way.
Me: Well, what is it about black hair that you like?
Ben: I just think it's the prettiest hair color.
Me: Who has BLACK hair that you know?
Ben: well.. Kaitlin does. (this is serious stuff because Kaitlin is his good friend who happens to have a crush on him in a major way!)
Me: *trying to remain calm and not sound like I am teasing* So, do you think you want to marry Kaitlin?
Ben: No. Just someone that has the same hair color as her.

RIGHT E-O.


Situation 4: If we could pick our own presidential candidates...

Ben: I would never vote for Megatron if he was running for President. Would you Luke?
Luke: Who is he running against?
Ben: Optimus Prime.
Luke: Then I would NEVER vote for Megatron. He would just blow up stuff.
Me: Well, doesn't Optimus Prime blow up stuff?
Ben: Yeah, but only bad things. If Megatron had control of our country, everyone would die.
Luke: If you could pick Jazz or Bumble Bee for President, who would you pick?
Me: That's a tough call because they are both good.
Ben: That's not hard at all. I would always pick Jazz. He's my favorite of ALL the Transformers.
Luke: Yeah, mine too. **which really means, I have no opinion, but chose whatever Ben chooses.**


Situation 5: Which of the three chipmunks is the coolest.

After watching the movie, I overheard this conversation (and I still laugh out loud every time I think about it.)

Ben: I think Alvin is the funniest even though he gets in the most trouble.
Luke: Yeah. and Simon is the smartest.
Ben: But Simon is never any fun.
Luke: And he has glasses.
Ben: Well, what about Theodore?
Luke: Um.... (LONG PAUSE)
Ben: Well, I guess he has a really big butt. ?

And you wonder why I Homeschool.