miss america and other news...

Last night I had all five of my men watching the Miss America pageant. We didn't intend to watch it as a family-- but once it started we just couldn't turn it off. Ben and Luke couldn't understand why it was a competition and when I explained that the prettiest girl won they thought I was kidding. Looking at it through their eyes, it does seem rather foolish. During the opening number (when all the contestants introduce themselves) Ben saw one of the girls on the screen and said, "Whoa. That girl should go home." Apparently Ben doesn't like blonds who cake on makeup.

I was hoping that someone would announce that most Americans don't have (or know how to use) maps or at least fall down on stage-- but unfortunately it wasn't as entertaining as we wanted it to be. We fast forwarded the "Lifestyle and Fitness" (aka swimsuit) competition but we enjoyed watching the girls in their evening gowns. Miss Virgina came out in a stunning yellow dress. Luke thought she looked like a brown banana. The judges didn't think so.... because she went home with the crown.


It was rough making it to church at 9:00 AM. I really miss our 1:00 PM routine... During Sacrament meeting, I put Simon over my shoulder to burp him and he spit up ALL over my outfit and hair. Why do I even bother getting ready for anything? It was such a crazy thing because Simon has spit up two times in his life... too bad one had to happen in church-- and all over me.

During the Sacrament, Zack couldn't figure out WHO was saying the prayers for the bread and water. He kept looking around and saying, "Who is talking, mom? Whose voice is that?" I pointed to our young Priesthood holders up at the front. Zack seemed relieved and said, "Oh. For a second, I thought it was Jesus talking." That kid definitely knows how to get a laugh.

Zack's interview

Since it began, no one in this house has been interested in my blog. I was okay with that. I figured there would come a time when my kids would appreciate the stories of their past. I am proud to announce that the time has already come. Ben and Luke have recently been reading through my archives.. and they giggle at almost everything they read. A few days ago they came across this interview. They loved it and Zack felt bad he didn't get to participate. I told him when I wrote it, he was too little to talk. He's not so little anymore... here are his answers.

What is something Dad always says to you?
Do you want to ride on my back?

What is something Mom always says to you?
Zack, I love you.

What makes Dad happy?
Hugging him.

What makes Mommy happy?
kissing and hugging dad.

What makes Dad sad?
kicking him in the wiener

What makes Mom sad?
kicking her in the face

How does Dad make you laugh?
When I ride on his back upstairs and he throws me on his bed.

How does Mom make you laugh?
When you tickle me on my belly.

How old is your dad?
19

How old is your mom?
16

How tall is your dad?
Taller than our new soft rug

How tall is your mom?
Same tall as dad, but shorter

What is daddy's favorite thing to do?
Play tennis

What is mom’s favorite thing to do?
Play games with us

What does your dad do when you're not around?
Kiss mom

What does your mom do when you're not around?
take a bath with candles

What is your dad really good at?
tennis

What is your mom really good at?
making food

What is your dad not very good at?
soccer

What is your mom not very good at?
falling off a cliff

What does your dad do for his job?
he wears a tie.

What does your mom do for her job?
she takes care of me.

What is your dad's favorite food?
Eggs

What is your mom’s favorite food?
Broccoli

If your dad were a cartoon character, who would he be?
a power ranger

If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Dora

How are you and your dad the same?
we're both crazy and funny

How are you and your mom the same?
we're on the blue eyed team

How are you and your dad different?
he's not small like me.

How are you and your mom different?
I have short hair and you have long hair.

If Dad was an animal what would he be?
Giraffe

If Mom was an animal what would she be?
a lizard... ?

bumper cars

Three years ago, I got into a car accident. One could hardly classify it as such, but it's listed on my driving record, so that's what we're calling it. Zack was a toddler and I was driving my trusty old minivan. We had just moved to Vegas and I was a bit turned around in the new city. I was turning right at a red stop light and basically rolled into the car in front of me. I was probably going 2 miles per hour- if that. After the "bump" I pulled to the side of the road to assess the damage. An older (ugly) couple jumped out of the other car and basically attacked me... calling me all kinds of names and swearing up a storm (the F-word included several times.) I tried to remain calm and tell them that I was sorry, but they were screaming so loud, they couldn't hear me. There was zero damage to my car and I couldn't see anything wrong with theirs, but they insisted that we switch insurance information. If I had known better, I would have gotten the cops involved so that they could take our statements at the scene of the crime. But I figured it was such a minor thing... I had no idea they were going to screw me over and claim that my little bump would cause all kinds of damage to their car. (My insurance paid out over $3700.) I came away from that accident in tears. I was positive that everyone who lived in Vegas was mean, ugly and terrible. The past three years have proved otherwise.

Today I got into the same kind of "accident" only my car was in front. I was on my way home from a 3-hour adventure with the kids (lunch with Aaron, the library, grocery shopping at Sam's and a quick stop at the outlet malls to ride the Carousel).. I was turning right at a red light when someone hit me from behind. It was a big enough bump for the kids to ask what happened, but I knew immediately that it was more like a bumper-to-bumper love tap. I pulled to the side of the road to talk to the other driver. She was an old, round black woman with silver hair. I could see that she was shaking as she got out of the car. She noticed that I had kids in the van and frantically asked if we were harmed. I gave her a big squishy hug and told her we were just fine. I held her soft hands as I reassured her that it could happen to anybody. Then I explained that I did the exact same thing a few years ago. She kept offering to exchange numbers but there was no need. My van was damaged, but she wasn't responsible for any of it.. (it was broken long before she hit me.) I gave her another hug and she said, "May the good Lord bless you." As I got back into my van and saw my handsome boys, I knew that the good Lord had already blessed me... immensely.

It's amazing how such a terrible experience (3 years ago) could have such a positive affect on me. As soon as I saw this poor shaking woman, I wanted to reach out to her because I will never forget being sworn at when I was at fault. Those squishy hugs I got today healed my heartache inside... sadness that I didn't even know I was carrying around until today. It made me realize that some of the worst experiences serve a purpose in our lives and DO teach us the lessons that we need to learn. I just wish I could have learned the same lesson without having to pay extra on my insurance premiums..

ps. if the lady who hit me had been texting, I would have sued her pants off!!

checkmate

Simon getting his first tutorial in the game of chess
(the 60 second video version can be found on our other blog.)

Many people ask me if I am worried whether my boys will turn out NERDY because I homeschool. I realize the "socialization factor" is a big issue for many people who consider homeschooling. I think the whole topic is bogus. Who says that sending kids to school makes them cool? I knew plenty of geeks in my high school. They were probably raised by socially-inept parents.

Truth be told, I am proud of my little nerds. They are nice, obedient, calm and intelligent. Who cares if they happen to wear their pants a little higher than other kids their age? I figure if I raise them nerdy, they will grow up to be respectful teenage boys who find only nice (nerdy) girls to date. In fact, my ultimate goal as a mother is to raise SUCH DWEEBS that they won't stand a chance with the shallow, snobby "popular" girls. I want to guarantee I WON'T have one of those for a daughter-in-law....

This is EXACTLY why we teach them to play CHESS
before they are old enough to hold up their own head.

PS. I am so glad I documented this particular chess game because Ben has been on a major winning streak and Luke finally conquered! It's unbelievable that I haven't been able to beat Ben-- when I am seriously playing my best. (and I am not bad for a girl.. I was in the chess club in elementary school.)

PPS. my cell is finally fixed. I am texting as fast as my little fingers will allow. Except NEVER, ever, EVER while driving. That Oprah freaked me out.

inside the brain of Benjamin

Ben's math curriculum is teaching CALENDARS right now. If you knew my Ben, you would realize this is a subject we do NOT need to cover. He has been a calendar FREAK from the time he could talk. His brain collects dates and stores them forever. He is not a brilliant child by any means, but when it comes to remembering dates, birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, seasons and so forth, he has a memory like Rain Man.

So- today we skipped the one hour lesson and went straight to the busy work. If he wasn't "attending" an online school I would skip the worksheets too... (this is one of the downsides from having someone tell you WHAT to teach.) Anyway, I gave him the homework without any explanation. I failed to point out that he needed to use the calendar from the text book (we didn't open the text because we didn't do the lesson....) I left him alone to feed the baby and mop the kitchen floor. When I came back to check on him- about 30 minutes later- he was really stressing out, trying hard to fight back his tears. I picked up his half-finished worksheet and asked him what was wrong.

Ben (ashamed of himself, but trying not to show it) quietly said, "It's just that I can't remember when Mother's Day was in 2002. I'm sure it must have been a Sunday in May..." I burst out laughing and quickly showed him the 2002 calendar in his text book. He took a HUGE sigh of relief. I patted him on the back and said, "You should have come to me sooner. The worksheet didn't want you to answer the questions from MEMORY." Ben said, "Yeah. I thought it was weird that I should remember a holiday when I wasn't even one year old!"

Another great moment for the homeschooling archives. I returned to mopping the kitchen floor with a huge smile on my face. I am so blessed to know (and to teach) this child.

it's hard to find a recent picture of Ben without Simon. These two are always together...
Simon is not necessarily happy about this.

booger sucker

I was laughing at myself (and at my kids-NEVER-sleep-in-my-bed post) at 3 AM this morning. I was sandwiched between Simon and Zack. Simon was stuffy all day yesterday even though I squeegeed out his nose before bedtime. (Don't you love those booger suckers?) He was up at 3 because he couldn't breath. I figured I would sleep next to him so he didn't suffocate to death.. Jane's comment scared me a little.

Anyway, Zack came in just a bit later because he peed the bed. This hasn't happened in a long time, but last night he fell asleep watching American Idol and apparently didn't go potty before. Zack came into my bedroom in dry clothes. (He's independent, that one.) I figured if I already had one in bed with me, why not another?

Then Aaron woke up with a bad dream.. he was really freaked out. I can't laugh because I have crazy dreams every night, but Aaron never does. He thought that zombies were breaking into some hospital (where we were trapped) and they were trying to eat our hearts. This is the very reason my husband doesn't like my blog-- because I write about his nightmares for the world to read.

On to other news. My new year's resolution is coming along rather nicely. I am feeling more sane by the minute. There are no big miracles to report but I am definitely getting answers and feeling more peace. I might even try to add another goal to my list..

A few people have chosen to take "a picture a day" for 2010. I think it's a great idea, but I am NOT a photographer and don't think it would really capture my days like I want it to. So, I thought I would do a 60 second video clip everyday. Nothing fancy, just a minute of our day that I think is worth capturing. I will be posting them on our video blog and making a 2010 DVD at the end of the year with 300 one-minute clips. I am excited about it. Too bad I didn't think of it until the end of January. HOW is it possible that January is already gone? sheesh.

pretty in pink

Poor little Simon doesn't know why he's sitting in a PINK bumbo.

Truth is, I didn't want to buy one when my sister (with four girls) had one hangin' around.

I thought it might help him hold up his head (he is still as FLOPPY as ever)

But Simon will find a way to cuddle with anything.

I love that he is such a snuggle-bug..

pictures taken by Ben

losing face

Zack received a fun birthday card from his adopted Grandma. Inside was a $5 bill and a paper airplane with stickers! Zack was thrilled, but he didn't think the stickers belonged on the airplane....

Simon's love affair with his crib

I just spent 7 nights away from home. Simon was MIS.ER.ABLE. Well, during the day he was cute and smiley for anyone that would look in his direction. But at night, he was not a happy camper. He would NOT sleep for anything. I tried a swing, a pacifier, nursing him all night, car rides in his cozy seat, cuddling him in bed, rocking him for hours... you name it. Nothing would do. The longest he slept the entire week was a 3-hour stretch. I was extremely frustrated because before we left, he was sleeping like a champ. He slept through the night at 6 weeks and never looked back. I was cursing myself for messing up our sweet schedule.. I knew I would have to train him all over again as soon as we got home.

But guess what? The kid is in love with his crib. The first night we were home he slept a SOLID 14 hours. I couldn't believe it. I had to wake him at 10 AM because I thought he was dead. And last night, after napping most of yesterday in his crib (I figured he was just tired from our excursion) he slept another 12 hours without a peep. I cannot tell you how refreshed I feel! Sleep makes ALL the difference in my world.

After struggling with my first baby (Ben didn't sleep through the night until he was 10 months old...and honestly he didn't know how to put himself back to sleep until he was four) I realized that you actually have to train them to sleep on their own. And by train them, I mean let them cry. It was so hard for me to understand that letting them scream doesn't mean I was a bad mother. In fact, when you allow them to cry to sleep, you are teaching them that they don't NEED you to fall asleep on their own. I don't think any type of soothing is good either.. my kids don't get swings, swaddling or pacifiers because when it stops-- they wake up. I will get out of bed if the house is on fire, but not to put a pacifier back in my baby's mouth. That's probably why they grow out of the pacifier stage at 3 months... ?

I know everyone has their own theory about how to get a baby to sleep, but for me (and my sanity) I need them far, far away... I don't want to hear every movement or grunt. And if hearing them cry is pulling at my heart strings, I turn on a fan (or an alarm clock that sounds like the ocean :) and I pretend I can't hear them. It's amazing that only after a few short weeks, they realize that crying doesn't win any brownie points with mom. Bedtime is no monkey business. I swear to you, Simon let out a sigh of relief when I put him in his crib. I think he knew we were all about to get a good night's sleep.

Of course, there are a few exceptions.. but only a few. My kids can come in my bedroom when they are sick, teething or hungry because I forgot to feed them dinner :) And every once in a while I need a cuddling partner (aka Luke) when my husband isn't around. I figure if I am nice enough in the waking hours, then I can be as mean as I want to when it's bedtime. You might think I am a cold-hearted momma, but I sure do sleep well. And so do my babies...

pictures by Kashina

we're BAAAAACK.

It feels so good to be home. It was probably crazy to leave town with four kids (one newborn) and no husband to help. But it was better than I thought it would be. The trick is to have really LOW expectations, then everything turns out incredibly awesome!

We had such a good time with extended family... the boys love their bazillion cousins who live just blocks from each other. We had a ball playing in the snow for 2.5 minutes. And we were so happy to leave it behind!

The WORST part of week (besides not getting any sleep) was the fact that I didn't take pictures. I brought my camera, but I guess I was too absent-minded to document the trip. The BEST part of the week was hanging out with loved ones. I need to write more about my wonderful friends and family who graciously made an effort to spend time with me. I really needed the girl time. Aaron went on a business (ski) trip with his firm and was able to hang out in Salt Lake the last day and drive home with me. I love having a husband around.. (and not just any husband. mine.)

I have two big announcements to make, so listen closely.

#1- My cell phone is out of commission. There's nothing like being out of town with a broken cell phone. If you called or texted me in the last week, I probably didn't receive it. Call me at home. If you need my home number, email me. Or just wait a week or two until it's repaired.........

#2- Anyone up for a BACHELOR party tonight? My place at 8 PM or 8:30-ish so we can skip the commercials.. I might have some food around this place-- microwave popcorn, for sure. (Don't worry, I won't put the popcorn in the same green bowl my placenta was in..)

I am not as excited to watch it now that Michelle is gone. Hopefully the girls left will cook up some more drama. Did anyone see Jake on Ellen last week? I didn't, but I found a clip on youtube. Do you think he came away solo? He doesn't seem very happy/cheeseball-like.

And here's crazy-in-the-head Michelle. I really do miss her.. bless her heart.

Placenta: The Other White Meat

DO NOT read if you have a weak stomach.

This post has been a draft for over two months. I waited so long to publish it because I wasn't exactly sure what to say exactly or how I felt about it. I am still not I am in the right frame of mind to share my experience, but here it is anyway. If you thought the circumcision post was controversial, buckle your seat belt.

Placentophagy:
the act of mammals EATING the placenta of their young after childbirth.

Most mammals digest their placenta after their babies are born. Maybe it's instinctive. Maybe they are starving. Maybe that's how God intended it to be. Maybe digesting the placenta balances your hormones, gives you more energy, increases your milk supply, lessens postpartum bleeding, helps you shrink your uterus. I did a lot of research before Simon was born and found myself wanting to experiment for myself.

That's right folks, I digested my placenta and I lived to tell the story. I wish I would have documented the whole process more thoroughly.. but sadly, I only have a few pictures. This video does a better job of explaining what happened. (If only my husband would have been excited enough to record the midwife who came over to my house....)

I went through a company called Placenta Benefits. You can read about WHY I did it HERE.

I didn't even see my placenta, but was glad that someone took a picture of it just after delivery.. This is one of my green kitchen bowls-- yes, I still use it today :) The placenta was taken to my kitchen and stored in the fridge in a ziplock bag.


A midwife came to my home just hours after delivery and did all the dirty work. She brought everything she needed and cooked/dried my placenta in this small black box which sat on my counter top. (Sorry about the picture.. I sent Ben downstairs to take a picture of it, and this is what we have...) There was no smell, no boiling on the stove, no sign of placenta anywhere.


After it was dried (about 12 hours later) the same midwife came back to my home and encapsulated my placenta into about 100 pills. They were left in my kitchen and I was free to digest. (picture taken by Ben also :) I took the pills three times a day with a large glass of water, until they were gone.


Am I glad I did it? Yes.

Will I do it again with my next baby? I am not sure. I am not worried if people think I am weird. I did not think it was gross. I didn't think it didn't cost too much ($250). But after digesting all of my pills, I don't feel any differently than I did with my previous deliveries. I wish I could say that I had an unbelievable recovery. My energy did not go through the roof. My milk supply is not great. The weight didn't shed.... I basically feel just as crappy as ever :) I wanted to do things as "naturally" as I possibly could, but almost three months after the birth, I am here to say I can't tell a difference. I waited so long to talk about it because I wanted to have an opinion one way or another. Sad to say I don't have anything miraculous to report..

If you want to read more about it, here are just a few articles that I read before Simon was born. They may or may not spark your interest.

Afterbirth: It's what's for dinner
Why Eat a Placenta?
Want a side of Placenta with that?
Placentophagia: A Biobehavioral Enigma
Placenta pizza? Some new moms try old rituals
Medicine: Protective Placenta
Ingesting the Placenta

Simon Patrick

My sweet baby boy was blessed by his Daddy today.

I feel overwhelmed with gratitude...
To my Heavenly Father for a wonderful husband
and four healthy, happy boys.
To my parents for their examples and support.
To my in-laws for raising such a great son.
To all our family and friends who traveled far to be here.
(and for all those who couldn't make it.)
For my testimony in the Gospel and
ward members who are our family away from home.

Today has been such a special day.
I love my adorable little Simon Patrick.
I am so thrilled that he's a part of our family.

PS

A HUGE THANKS to my friend Kashina for taking
darling pictures of Simon in his blessing outfit.
I have lots more to post later....

four and fabulous

Zack stats:
Age: 4 (pronounced FOE)
Height: 41 inches
Weight: 35 lbs

Favorites food: steamed broccoli
(he's come a long way since his cheeto stage.)
Favorite drink: 7-up
Favorite thing to do at home: COLOR, color, COLOR!
(and play games on the computer)
Favorite toy: the Batcave
Favorite movie: Iron Man
Favorite tv show: The Batman cartoon
Favorite book: The Hungry Caterpillar
Favorite animal: Giraffe
Favorite dog: Tootsie
Favorite Letter: Z
Favorite superhero: Batman!
What he wants to be when he grows up: a food tester ?
(I guess being a Doctor is overrated..)
Favorite color: Green
Favorite candy: Laffy Taffy
Afraid of: Gremlins
Favorite past-time: swimming!!


Believe it or not, Zack turns FOUR tomorrow. It's been a busy weekend with LOTS of family in town. Simon will be blessed on Zack's birthday, so we tried our best to celebrate a day early. All Zack wanted for his birthday was to go to Chuck E. Cheese's and to open a HUGE container of cheese balls (he's been asking me to buy them for 6 months.. and I always say, "Maybe on your birthday" :) With such low expectations, it was easy to make all of his birthday dreams come true...

Look who's FOUR!

Simon getting his first "video game tutorial"

Ben and Luke LOVED playing DEAL or NO DEAL
because you could get up to 50 tickets..

I think they just enjoyed seeing the cleavage on the girls who opened the cases. :)

Aaron and I were laughing about how ghetto we were. I didn't have on an ounce of makeup. Aaron hadn't showered and wore a hat that Ben got trick-or-treating.. I think we blended in perfectly with the rest of the weirdos there..

Boys + video games = Utopia.

Simon thoroughly enjoyed his first visit to Up-Chucks!
Flashing lights and LOUD silly noises.. what baby wouldn't be happy with that??

I could write for days about Zack and about how much I love (and hate) him, but he has more posts dedicated to him on this blog than anyone else. He has always been the center of attention, the life of the party and the heart of our family. We love you, Zackaroni!

Happy Birthday, crazy kid!

The Bachelor... (spoilers)

No, I seriously don't have time for this... but this is for my cuz SARAH! I just want to say that I hate this show-- and yet I will watch every episode and talk about it. Ever since the Rozlyn drama, spoilers are out. I read that Ali leaves on her own (apparently after the home town dates.) Gia came in third and is sent packing after the overnight dates. The show is setting it up so Tenley is the favorite. I like her, don't you? She makes it to the final two. And believe it or not.. Vienna is the last one standing.. VIENNA! What is this world coming to? Can I guarantee these rumors are true? Of course not. I'm just spreading a bit of gossip.. Do I believe Rozlyn slept with a producer? No, but I am glad to see her go. I am glad we won't have to see her boobs anymore.

And about Michelle.. I hear she's only around for one more show. That's too bad. She's been my favorite all along. I just love her drama. The girl who bothered me the MOST was lame Elizabeth who asked not to be kissed and then wouldn't get out of his face. So annoying....

Anyway, I hate the show. Jake is lame. But I will still be watching and can't wait for next Monday. seriously VIENNA???? It can't be true...

I read it here.

today

I have at least 6 loads of laundry to fold.
3 bathrooms to clean.
4 sets of sheets to wash.
7 rooms to vacuum.
a long list of groceries to buy.
a birthday party to plan.
a baby blessing to make food for.
a breast infection to get rid of.
a shower to take.
4 boys to feed and entertain.


and last (but definitely not least)
one LONG prayer to say.

who says boys don't play DRESS UP?

A dreadful hazing took place in our home today.
Simon was unwillingly initiated into the Star Wars Fraternity.

Believe it or not, Zack was away at preschool when it happened. Ben and Luke were putting away a stuffed Yoda doll (a Christmas present that Ben purchased for Zack) and realized he was exactly Simon's size... so they stripped Simon down and YODISGUISED him. The sleeves were a bit too long, but overall, it seemed to fit just right.

Welcome to the galaxy of the supernatural, little Jedi.
I will do my best to try to protect you from the Dark Side.

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Did anyone else have to discipline a little boy for pulling down his pants inside a fast food play area and peeing by the slides today? Anyone?

........Anyone?

LABELS: Zack, wieners, miniature disasters, Bad Moms Anonymous

my stay-at-home date with Zack

We've all had a bad cough/croup/fever going on for a couple of weeks. We got it around Christmas and then gave it to my sister and her girls when they came to visit for New Years. What a way to ring in 2010!

The only one who didn't get knocked down with the illness was Simon. *insert Hallelujah chorus here* Poor little Zack suffered the most and he has been a difficult child to handle. Friday afternoon, we were all feeling cooped up in the house. I told the kids if we could zip through a few projects and clean up really well before Daddy came home from work, we could go out to dinner as a family. Ben and Luke ran around the house cleaning up and being helpful. Zack basically made a mess, threw fits and cried a lot.

When Daddy came home the house was spotless, but I didn't think it was fair that Zack got to go out after being such a pill. It also wasn't fair to stay home after the older boys listened so well. We decided it was best if Dad took Ben and Luke out for dinner and Zack, Simon and I stayed home. I hate to separate the family on a Friday night, but sometimes discipline is more important than families being together forever.

When the older boys left, Zack had another breakdown. I tried to explain (for the millionth time) why he couldn't join them and told him he was going to bed early. As I was helping him change into his pajamas, his cute little red-blotchy face looked up and me and said, "Mom! When my brain hurts, I don't feel like being nice!" I tried not to laugh and realized that I was probably being a bit hard on the little guy. He hasn't felt well for weeks and we've been trapped in our house. Why should I expect him to behave perfectly? So instead of putting him straight to bed, I told him that we were going to have a PARTY-- just the two of us. (Simon was around too, but when you're sleeping, you don't count.)

We went downstairs (in pj's) and blasted some good music. I put Zack on my hip and we danced around the house like drunken fools. We colored pictures together, played superhero Memory match, read a few poems by Shel Silverstein, ate macaroni and cheese (and PICKLES!) for dinner and then decided to whip up a batch of chocolate chip cookies before the boys came home. I was surprised by our serious conversations because Zack is almost ALWAYS trying to crack a joke.. He told me about his pet-alligator dream that turned into a nightmare and how he thinks he needs to have a nightlight in his room. He also said that his dreams about Batman never turn into nightmares. He nonchalantly told me that Batman usually comes to pick him up in the Bat-mobile and they will go to Walmart and the movies together. I never knew!

Zack's favorite part of the night was taking pictures with the camera. (surprise, surprise.) We played a game where I would take a picture of him making a silly face and then he would take a picture of me trying to copy him. My favorite part were the funny things Zack said, especially because he wasn't trying to be funny.

While coloring, he said, "I drew a Power Ranger with long legs, like a LADY!"

During our dinner conversation, he said, "When I grow up, I want to be a doctor.... so I can be RICH!" I asked him what he would buy with all his money, and without missing a beat, he raised his hands in the air and said, "A plate of PANCAKES!"

By the time the older men got home, we were cuddled up together in Zack's blanket, ready to go to sleep. Ben, Luke and Dad had a great time out together and Aaron and I both agreed that we need to divide the troops more often....

just a human

Last night, Zack was doing something on the computer and ended up scrolling through my blog. He was thrilled to see pictures of our family on the screen. He enthusiastically said, "Hey! Someone drew a white circle on Lukey's face!" I sat down next to him and clicked through a few posts about himself (he was such a silly baby!) He loved it and begged to see more.

Eventually he realized that no matter what blog entry we clicked on, the sidebar pictures remained on the screen. He said, "Those are never going away!" quickly followed by "It says I am 4. I'm only THREE!" I explained that his birthday is in a week, so it's okay to say that he's 4. He wanted to know what it said under his picture, so I told him: A COMPLETE SPAZ. As soon as I read the words, he got a terrible look on his face and said "I am NOT a complete SPAZ!" I responded, "Really? Then what are you?"

He slightly shrugged his shoulders, smiled and said,
"I'm just a human."


if you say so, kiddo.

my child with the circle head

I tucked my kids in bed at 9 pm last night. Aaron was still at work (I think he arrived home sometime after 11.) Simon was finally asleep and I was looking forward to picking up my new read. [Counte of Monte Cristo. I am on page 72.] Just as I pulled down my covers, Luke came in my bedroom. I saw that a couple of tears were forming in his eyes and asked him if he was scared. He said, "No. But yesterday when I asked if I could cuddle with you in your bed, you told me that I could tomorrow. And you never did." I smiled and said, "The day is not over yet!"

He crawled in next to me and laid his head on my pillow. Our faces were about 6 inches away from each other. His chocolately brown eyes were wide open, the tears gone. I asked him if he was sad that Simon was joining the blue-eyed team. (the baby has blue eyes, btw.) He shook his head on the pillow. I said, "It's kinda cool that you are the only kid with brown eyes. It makes you unique." His eyebrows raised and he excitedly said, "Ya. And I'm basically the only one in the family with a circle head."


That's basically why I love him. Because he has the cutest circle head in the family. Oh, and because he brings the baby to me in the middle of the night..

A few weeks ago, Luke was by my bed at 2 am. He was holding Simon. Obviously, I was exhausted and didn't hear the baby crying. But Luke did and decided to bring him to me. He didn't say much.. maybe a "Here, mom." And then headed back to bed. I thought it was awfully sweet of him.

The next morning when I was a little more coherent, I said to myself, "wait a minute... Luke isn't tall enough to get the baby out of his crib. Ben can hardly do it himself and Ben is several inches taller than Luke." So I went to the nursery and found it like so:


Yes, at 2 am, Luke woke up, heard the baby crying and tried to get him out of the crib. When he realized he was too short, he went into the bathroom and got a step stool. When one wasn't enough, he got another and stacked in on top of the first. That seemed to do the trick. A smarter (and less service-oriented) child would have told his mom to get her lazy butt out of bed and get the baby herself. I am not sure if I should be grateful or not. This could have turned out with a different ending......

Should I be telling this story on my blog when CPS could be knocking on my door any minute? I figure if they didn't take me away after Zack drove the minivan, I should be okay. I hope so, anyway.

three things I learned at the gym...

Last night I had my first official workout since Simon was born. Nine weeks is longer than I've waited with the others, but 4 kids has done a NUMBER on me. I typically enjoy working out in the mornings (the BEST time of day) but mornings are no good when you don't sleep well. So at 9 pm, when Aaron arrived home from work, I packed my things and headed solo to the gym. While there, I learned three things. Actually, I believe I knew all these things before going to the gym, but they were SOLIDIFIED during my workout.

#1. I have absolutely zero fashion sense. I've known for years that the gym is a meat-market for the shallow single people. Girls love to do their hair pretty and wear make-up so they can look hot while sweating it off. I have no issues with this. But the outfits the women were (not) wearing seriously threw me for a loop! Not a single girl I saw had a shirt on. I didn't get the memo that sports bras with little straps (one size too small) were the new trend. I actually thought about taking my baggy t-shirt off so I could blend in. And whatever happened to the old pair of cut-off sweats-shorts? Did they go out of style with leg warmers and blue eyeshadow? Apparently so. My elliptical machine was directly behind a young woman who wore TIGHT see-through leggings. I kid you not. I could clearly see her black pair of thong underwear as though she were wearing no leggings at all. Did she KNOW her shorts were transparent? Should I tell her I can see her naked butt? I asked myself that very question the entire 28 minutes I was behind her behind.

#2. I have absolutely zero interior decorating skills. again, I thought I knew this before I arrived, but now I am 100% certain. As I tried to steer my eyes away from Miss Thong-Butt, I found myself interested in the HGTV channel on the flat screen to my left. I watched as a couple went through their home with an interior designer. They did a panoramic view of every room in the house. But without the sound from the television, I literally COULD NOT decipher if the house was in the BEFORE or AFTER stage of the remodel. If it was BEFORE, every room should be a disgrace. But I didn't notice any problems. The living area had funky green chairs and a mismatching shag rug. The white drapes in the bedroom looked vintage and expensive. The bathroom had cool blue and green checkered tile on the walls. Was this a good or a bad thing???? I did not know. If it was AFTER an amazingly expensive remodel, it should have knocked my socks off. But my socks remained on. I am dead serious, people. I've GOT to know if floral wallpaper is IN or OUT. If it's out, I think it should come back in.

#3 Lady Gaga is insanely groovy. It doesn't matter what song she's singing, it will make you get your groove on. I liked her before my workout, but now I am in love. I realize she's a bit... odd (she was probably the inspiration behind the invisible workout pants) but one cannot listen to Bad Romance without moving. What is it about nonsense words and a funky beat that makes you want to take it up 5 notches? Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah. Roma, roma-ma, Ga-ga, ooh la la..... this Lady brings out the freak in me. and I rather like it.

ps. I love (and appreciate) the circumcision discussion below. Please don't let this nonsense-of-a-post distract you from commenting on a more serious subject. I'm getting closer to a decision but still praying about it. more on that later.

pps. Simon is two months old today. no need for cake/balloons/pictures, but I think it's worth mentioning. We can all thank him for this post written at 4 am. Babies can be so fussy sometimes.

LABELS: exercise, what do interior decorators know anyway?, thongs, disgusting, Lady Gaga, HGTV, wallpaper: IN or OUT?, Two months already!

to circumcise or not to circumcise? that is the question.

Simon is two months old and has yet to be circumcised. We never intended on waiting this long to do it. Our other boys were only hours old when their foreskin was chopped. But Vegas pediatricians want you to wait two weeks for the procedure. Then it took 30 days to get Simon on our insurance.. a bit more effort with a home delivery. When I took him to the doctor at 1 month, they told me that my insurance will only cover the costs of circumcision if it's done in the first 30 days. That would have been nice to know 30 days ago! So now, we have to go to a urologist, but because he's a specialist, we have to wait another month.... talk about getting the run around.

In the past two months, I've been reading a lot about circumcisions and the more I read, the less I want to have it done. With my other kids, I just did it because I thought that's what everyone did. No one wants their child to be the odd one out... {Nightmares of locker room laughter made me do it.} But lo and behold! Not every boy is circumcised. Statistics show that it's 50/50. Say what? It's higher if you consider ethnicity/religion (apparently it's much higher around the bible belt... because a man whose not circumcised will be damned straight to hell.) I've also come to find out that studies are basically inconclusive about hygiene and sexual pleasure. If it doesn't actually benefit the child/man, WHY get it done? Especially if we are going to be paying $500+ out of pocket for the procedure.

Statistics in our home read differently... is not 50%. Do I make Simon be the odd man out? Will I scar him for life if he's different from his brothers? If you do one, you should do them all.. but is that a good reason to make him go under the knife? I am not sure.

Now that he's bigger (a whopping 11 lbs) and more aware of what's going on, I am freaking myself out that it's going to be terrible. I wasn't present when my other boys were circumcised (I basically don't want to have anything to do with it... it's a great daddy/baby bonding moment.) But Aaron is super busy and I think I may have to brave it alone. Am I stressing over nothing? Have any of you witnessed it?

You would think by the FOURTH boy, I would have this sort of thing figured out.. The longer we wait the worse it's gonna be. I would hate to decide it's time to get it done when he's in junior high school.. "Sorry, we waited so long, son. It look us 14 years to make up our mind."

Get off your ATH. Let's do some MATH!

Sorry about the title. We've been doing math for hours and it's the only line from School of Rock worth quoting.

It's already been a loooong week and it's only Tuesday. I am without a car and without a husband (he's back in court again and we're lucky to see him before bedtime.) It's frustrating but no car + no husband = no bra... and that's ironically uplifting. Preschool is back in session for Zack.. and the older boys are back to hitting the books. I am trying to dig up motivation to get them excited about statistics, adverbs, the nervous system, etc... but when I don't care, they don't either.

I'm struggling trying to find TIME for everything. I know it's what everyone struggles with, but I promise, I'm struggling more. Christmas break was awesome, but with so many visitors, we didn't relax much. The kids schedules are completely whacked. Simon is trying hard to give me as much sleep as possible, but we are all deprived. ALL three of my kids have terrible coughs. And just when all of the other mothers with school-aged kids are feeling relieved to send the kiddos back to school, I am feeling tons of responsibility. I used to be able to do it with 3... that was comfortable for me. But 4 is a killer.. even after 2 months with Simon, I'm just as crazy as the day he was born. When do you start to feel normal again?

I feel so fickle because even though homeschooling is time consuming and stressful, it's also very rewarding. I love (LOVE) hanging out with my boys... (except for the albino child.. :) While Zack was at a friend's house, Ben Luke and I got cozy on our new rug and enjoyed the fake fire. Yes we may have spent 3 hours talking about fractions and division, but in the middle of everything, Luke would say something funny and we would all giggle. I took a picture because I wanted to remember how I felt... overwhelmed, cozy and happy.

Then I took a picture of sleeping Simon because he's just so...... perfect.
(enlarge if you want to see his lashes.)

On to other topics: My 2009 blog book is underway. As I type, 900+ pictures are downloading... Looking through my posts (225 from last year) it's unbelievable that there are several important stories that I haven't shared. Some are too personal or too vulgar (kidding..) but there are others that should be up on this blog sooner or later... But probably later because most of my free time will be spent organizing, changing fonts and getting ready for printing. This makes me feel justified in the all the time I've spent documenting.. I love reading the little conversations that would have been forgotten.. and I can't wait to have it sitting on my bookshelf. Yeah for BLURB!

Other things that excite me are the upcoming TV programs. Six months ago we got rid of our cable package. We now have the local channels and the LDS station. That's all we need, if anyone ever actually needs TV. We still have a DVR and that makes my life better in so many ways. I am counting down the days to American Idol... if only Adam Lambert could come back and walk down those stairs in a white suit again. But the addition of Ellen will be a good treat. And sad that I am blogging about The Bachelor, but when you don't have a husband around, you might as well watch a bunch of hoochie-mamas fight over a guy with a nice six pack. But it seems that no one agrees with me.. out of 312 people who read that post, I have just one comment. I think you are all just afraid to admit that you watch. Come out of the closet, it will feel so humiliating refreshing.

That's how I will end it, folks. Random and unorganized. So is my life.

On the Wings of LOVE

**SHALLOW ALERT**

I hate posting about The Bachelor right above my last post... but so it is. I wanna talk about it and my sisters aren't here. There is not a single show out there that can get me to laugh out loud like this one. Can you believe how STUPID women can be? I busted up on at least 4 different occasions.. and once I laughed so hard tears came to my eyes.. Do you want to know the scene? Michelle's introduction..

Michelle: I am so glad to finally meet you... I look forward to spending A LOT of time with you... and hopefully in the end I can become your co-pilot
Jake: Great. Have you ever flown before?
Michelle: * stutter* Um, I look forward to... um, being a um... passenger on your plane.

Maybe it was only funny because I was watching it so late, but people.. you can't write stuff that good. That Michelle is AWESOMELY EMOTIONAL! I am so very glad she's still around. She is gonna bring some good stuff, I just know it.

As far as Jake is concerned, I want to stick my finger in my mouth every time he talks. I cannot stand his cheesiness and have to fast forward his interview clips. When Jillian and Ed came back on, I just felt sad that she wasn't still the Bachelorette. She was so much more fun to watch every week than Jake.... but at least he's got 15 dramatic girls to entertain us.


Okay, so... If I was the Bachelor, I would have totally given Elizabeth the first impression rose... we would have gotten along because neither of us have fashion sense.. But apparently Jake and I don't have the same taste. He didn't keep her around.. and now she's lost her chance at love FOREVER.

From the girls left, I really liked Ali (the second girl who tripped, although it wasn't as bad as the first girl who tripped.)


But Tenly is a cutie-pie (or a cuddle-bug, if you will) and I think she is cheesy and more Jake's type. {Obviously since they already kissed.} They would have the most perfect life together and the most perfect babies....

Anyway, what do you think? WHO will get the final rose? and did you know that Paris Hilton... aka Vienna... is trying out to be Jake's wife?

January 4, 2000

Ten years ago today I was in a crowded computer lab in Rexburg, ID. It was the first day of school after Christmas break. I was recovering from mononucleosis and didn't know what to do with my life. I went to the computer lab to write a paper. Instead, I opened up my email account and found an unexpected email from a dear friend. Only I didn't think we were friends anymore because I had already broke his heart. When I saw his name in my inbox, I felt a mixture of emotions: excitement, happiness, comfort, and curiosity. But mostly, seeing his name made me feel like I was home. (Only at the time I didn't realize that all those feelings were LOVE.)

I read his email while tears formed in my eyes. It wasn't very long-- it got straight to the point. He listed reasons why he loved me, the little things that many of my close friends didn't even know. He told me he admired me for wanting to take over the world. He told me to get off my high horse and give him a chance. He wanted to be more than just friends.

I printed the email and walked home reading it over and over again. It was cold outside, but reading his words made me feel warm inside. I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't want to lead him on if I couldn't commit. I didn't want to hurt him. I didn't want to lose his friendship. But something inside was telling me this was worth giving it another shot. I was not the same girl who turned him down countless times before. I had changed. Everything seemed good and I had a feeling it was going to turn out okay.

When I arrived at my apartment, I was relieved to see that none of my roommates were home. It was quiet. I went straight to my bedroom and knelt down next my bed. I prayed out loud. I don't know why I felt the need to ask if this was the guy I was going to marry-- it wasn't like we had ever kissed (or even been on a second date.) But I needed to know NOW if it was going to work out. Because if it wasn't, I couldn't go through with it. The minute the words left my lips: "Is HE the man I am going to marry?" a feeling came over me. It was the strongest, clearest answer I had ever received to a prayer. It was much more than a YES... it was as if someone said to me, "Why has it taken you THIS LONG to ask?" I was filled with peace. I was excited and confused and a bit taken aback, but I wasn't scared. I knew that Aaron was going to be my husband, but I didn't realize how lucky I was. Only after being married to him (and watching him raise my sons) do I realize the magnitude of that single decision. Lucky doesn't even begin to cover it.

Why am I sharing such a personal {sacred} story? Because 2010 is the year of answered prayers. Ten years ago, I offered a sincere prayer. The answer I received immediately after changed the direction of my life. It's amazing that God-- who is busy with a bazillion other (more important) things-- would care about a young college girl and her confusing love life. It's amazing that ten years later, He still cares about me and my day-to-day chaos. How grateful I am that He listens. I know without a doubt that He answers.