My baby isn't a baby anymore..

Dear Zack,

Tomorrow you turn 3. I hardly believe it's possible, but somehow it is. Your Transformer obsession has paid off and all of the sudden, you have transformed from a baby into a little boy. And not just any little boy, you are the most darling in the bunch.

Sometimes I might act like I don't like you very much, and every once in a while, I try to sell you on the Internet. But you and I both know that I am crazy about you. I couldn't stand a day without your sweet smile and silly personality...well, maybe a day, but definitely not a week! You've brought so much joy into our home. Honestly, you have been surprising us from the beginning.

I found out I was expecting you at 10 weeks.. and I was shocked. I wasn't planning on having a baby for a couple of years because Daddy was in law school and I didn't know if I could handle another baby, but you came anyway! When Daddy heard the news, he was so excited that he loaded us in the car and took us all out to dinner. I still cannot drive by a Ruby Tuesdays without thinking of how thrilled Daddy was to welcome a new child into our family. But I wasn't exactly thrilled.. I was sick!!! After dinner, we headed to the LDS visitor's center next to the St. George temple. It was at this visitors center, while watching a short family film, that you and I began our relationship.

As I sat there trying to wrap my thoughts around having another baby, you told me that it was your time to come. The feeling went from the top of my head down to my toes. I also felt that you were being sent as a special delivery package from two loving Grandparents whom I had never met. Daddy's grandparents (Duke and Lee Burnham) both passed away when Daddy was a boy, many years before I met him. While sitting in that film, stressing about how I was going to get through the pregnancy... I felt their love around me. Something told me that they knew you well and that they were sending you down to bless our lives. I can't think about it without getting tears in my eyes. We struggled coming up with a first name for our third boy, but Burnham was chosen for your middle name months before you were born.

These last three years have proved to be eventful, to say the least. You have been a little spitfire from day one. You've always been strong-willed. You know what you want and don't settle for anything less, but you definitely have a softer-side. You give fantastic hugs, slobbery kisses and you tell the best secrets. After Christmas shopping with Daddy you came home and announced all your secrets. You said, "I am never going to tell Mommy that I bought her a candle! Cause it's a surprise!" When we laughed, you smiled and said, "It's a red candle and it smells yummy! and it's a secret!" Often you whisper secrets in my ear like, "Should we make cookies?" or "The Force is strong with you." I always love when you will sit on my lap and talk to me because it's few and far between. I'll take whatever I can get.

It's amazing that you could make us laugh from such a tiny age. At six months old, you understood what it meant to be funny. If you saw that your brothers were giggling at something you did, even if it was something you did by accident, you would continue to do it over and over and over until everyone was worn out. You still exhaust us... and we feel so lucky to be part of your audience. This past year has been enlightening because your sense of humor has progressed from silly facial expressions to full-blown conversation and it's truly entertaining. You use phrases that are waaay too mature for your three year old body. But then again, you have always thought you were older than you actually are. Last week, while driving (meaning I was behind the wheel, not you) you looked out the window and shouted, "Hey! There's Toys R Us! Let's check it out!" And because it got a laugh, you've said the phrase "check it out" a hundred times since!

Your love for your brothers shows in everything you do. You have always felt a part of the crowd. The day you were born, Ben and Luke were so excited to touch every part of your body, and basically, they were poking your eyes out. It didn't bother you one bit... it was almost as if you were saying, "I knew what I was getting myself into." Over the years, you and your brothers have become quite the threesome. You have never wanted to do little toddler things. Your favorite movies are the ones Ben and Luke love. You can keep up with any conversation on Star Wars and it's amazing you recognize the characters the way you do! I will have to capture it on video before you move onto your next phase. The other day, you came up from behind me while I was folding laundry. You put your light saber to my throat and said in the deepest voice possible, "Join the DARK SIDE." When I told you I would never join, you responded, "Then you must be destroyed." And we both laughed.

You are everyone's buddy. You will pick someone for the day (or hour) and grab their hand while saying, "Do you want to be buddies? Then let's play something together." You enter the room expecting the spotlight and you usually get it. If you can't get my attention right away, you'll say, something like, "Hey, Babe!" cause you know it will get me to laugh. On occasion, by Dad's prompting, you will say, "Watcha doing, sexy?" Daddy is determined to raise perverts, obviously.

I am not going to deny the fact that you make messes like it's going out of style! We used to call you the baby tornado because wherever you were, it was a disaster zone. You are busy and very sneaky.. and that combination has made my blood boil. But there is enough reason to keep you around! You're creativity is really incredible. You have always been an artist. It's just too bad that most of that artwork has been on our walls and we've had to paint over them :( Lately, you are obsessed with drawing the perfect circle and we love to hear you say, "Look at this circle.. it's so cool!" We're not sure which word is "circle" and which is "so cool" cause they sound exactly the same. But honestly, your circles are so cool.. I am sure way beyond most three-year-old's capabilities! Who knew you were an overachiever?

I am grateful for the time that I have with you and for what you have taught me in your short life. Our family would feel such a void without your charisma and charm, Zacky. My wish for you is to love the life you live, have passion for the things you do, and develop into the man you were destined to become.. (either that or become a Jedi knight. It's a toss up..) I can't wait to see what you have to offer the world. You have already brought so much happiness to ours.

Happy Birthday, son. I'm so glad you're mine.

Mom

comments off