not this cute anymore!Ben quickly said, "Mom! I already knew that you loved me!!"
I acted surprised, "How did you already know?"
He rolled his eyes and said,
"Because you've never said that you DIDN'T love me."My husband thought Ben's comment was genius and said, "Now THAT's a man talking! If we tell you we love you, then we do. If there ever comes a time when we change our minds, then we'll be sure to let you know."
THIS is the very reason why I hate men. Why do they have to be so emotionally stable and secure with themselves? It makes us women look stupid. Women may be from Venus, but Men are heartless robots. All they need is food and sex. Just because we would like an occasional compliment doesn't make us needy and insecure! I may sound like I am MAD, but that's only because I am.
Last night before going to bed, I had a lighthearted conversation with my husband that went a little like this:
Me: So, I posted that old Ricks college elections video on my blog today.
Him: What video? What blog?
Me: The skit with the tarantula and the pie in my face.
Him: cool. (which means the same as, "let's end the conversation HERE.")
Me: I wrote about how much it meant to me that you came to the big showing.. and how I think that was probably the night that you fell in love with me.
Him: Are you sure that wasn't some other guy? I don't think I went. (he's dead serious, people.)
Me: Oh come on! You were crazy about me and wouldn't have missed it for the world.
Him: I don't remember anything about that night.
Me: You don't remember seeing that video, the one where the crowd screamed because a guy licked all the way up my face?
Him: Oh, maybe. Wasn't there a problem with the sound?
Me: No. Not if you mean when my speech was cut off by the U2 song (starting to get annoyed.)
Him: Maybe it wasn't the sound. I just think I didn't have a good seat for the show and couldn't see your skit very well.
Me: You were sitting right next to me, you big jerk!
Him: What?
Me: You have told me plenty of times that you fell in love with me during elections week.
Him: (shrugging) I guess I could have said that.
Me: UGH.
Him: What is wrong with you?
Me: Nothing was wrong with me until I started talking to you.
Him: What do you want me to say?
Me: Nothing. I will just pull out my old book of letters that you wrote me before you started hating me.
Him: [Laughing hysterically-- but at me, definitely not with me.]
Me: Just so you know, you're not getting any tonight.
Him: Do you want me to read our blog? Would that make you happy?
Me: No, and it's MY blog, not ours.
Him: [still laughing-- while I roll over and turn out the light.]
___________________________________________________________
Why are men so difficult to deal with? Seriously. I am not saying I am a fan of same sex marriages, but I bet they have a lot fewer headaches over communication issues. Or maybe it's just me.
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48 comments:
My husband always says, "Of course I love you, I married you, didn't I?" sigh.
You can't win either way with men!... I can remember one time being frazzled with a lot of things going on... yes all the time.. but this time Patrick was just leaving or something and said "gotta go, I love you"... well me being busy called back, "Thanks, bye"... apparently that was wrong!... One of those go no where discussions that night! (Of course that was years ago... nowadays... he should be glad I answered him at all)
But as for lesbians... I do happen to know a few... and they have a whole different set of communication issues! Apparently staying with men.. is the easier way!
I love that he pulled the same line of "What's wrong with you" followed by "What do you want me to say...will me doing [such and such] make you happy?" He seriously thinks I was in a bad mood BEFORE talking with him. I'm glad to know that my husband isn't defected...just a husband.
It is NOT just you! But as an outsider looking in, that conversation is hilarious! I have had a few and they are not funny when it's your husband, but Aaron just makes me laugh. seriously funny!
oh, and Ben is one smart kid!
I laughed so hard. Jon is the same way. He will sometimes just say, what do you want me to do or say. Other times, I think he fakes asleep so he can end the conversation.
Ha! Ah...the normalness of this conversation warms my heart. I'm not sure I could even count the number of times Brandon and I have had variations of this same arguement. I swear they act aloof and ignorant to keep up some sort of manly facade.
And Becky, your comment made me laugh.
If I knew he was ACTING that way to tease me, then I wouldn't have an issue with it. Sometimes I tell myself, "Oh, he's being this way so he can get a reaction out of me, so I am not going to fall for it." But the truth is, he REALLY thinks this way. He is not pretending. He is just being... a man, I guess.
I think men have an amazing ability to forget, and they don't care. Take Dave for example, last night we were watching the football game and he accidentally saw the score of the Brave's game (which he was taping and wanted to watch later). About an hour later we had put Andrew to be and we were watching the Brave's game. I asked, "what was the score when you saw it on the bottom line?" Then comes the famous line only a man could say "I tried to forget them, so I forgot them." We all know that a woman could never do that.
No Katie. Your husband is different than the rest of husbands. I know that because he is my brother. Dave, is basically a genius, and at the same time, he's an airhead. He can remember math equations but not his phone number. He gets easily side tracked, but he is not manipulative in your conversations.
Aaron is so different than Dave. He TRIES to get under my skin. He likes to see steam come out of my ears.. it makes him laugh.
I don't think that men are emotionally secure or confident. I think rather, they don't WANT their wives telling them they are cool, because that isn't cool.
But as for me and my husband, we have this EXACT SAME conversation every couple of weeks. It could be about dinner (did you like it, did you not?) or our plans for the weekend (do I look good in this? Is this outfit better than the other one?) and as soon as the words come out of my mouth and I see the look on his face, I feel like the biggest idiot. He will say something like, You ate the same food I did. Why do you need me to say that I thought it tasted good? You tasted it. If you liked it, then make it again. If you didn't, then don't. I don't really care either way. And then I don't ever want to make any dinner ever again. Why are they such jerks? ha!
I love Aaron. And I don't even know him. He is just super cool and is crazy about you, but doesn't want you to know it.
What totally blows my mind, though, is that he actually doesn't read your blog. Half of our husbands read it (daily, for instance) Sometimes Josh will come home from work and say, "Did you read what Janet wrote today, it's hilarious!" The only fights we have at our house are about whether he likes ME or would rather be married to you. jk.
Why doesn't he want to read it? or is that the big mystery.
I don't want him to read the blog-- I want him to WANT to read it.
And the truth is, we don't have the same kind of sense of humor. He doesn't find it funny. Basically, he hates me.
I was just FINE before he came along.. but ever since we've been married, it's like I need/want his approval and he's just really reluctant to give it. But if these are my biggest problems in life, then I should count myself lucky, right?
Jan-
I love you. :) I do like reading your blog, too , . . . even though I don't read everyday. I love your boyz, too. I miss them.
I just have one question for you: Does this blog make ANYONE happy? It gives girls an excuse to complain and whine; and makes guys cringe and not want to read the rest of the post.
Love you, Little Kevin
Kev-- you will understand when you're married. Or at least, your wife will.
Understand what? That girls need to whine together to know that their husbands love them?
exactly.
Coming from a man's perspective, your husband is right on. He doesn't want to talk about your video because it happened years ago and it has nothing to do with your situation or relationship now. We don't like to stroll down memory lane the way you girls do, especially at night. It always ends with the wife crying and the husband rolling his eyes. That's exactly why we tried to end the conversation when it started.
Having said that, your blog is one of the most entertaining blogs out there and always makes me laugh.
I am going anonymous today so I can keep my manly-hood. Please let Aaron know that he is a man's MAN.
the comment above is so typical of a man to say. In fact, it's probably from my husband.
The thing is, girls DO want to stroll down memory lane. Because it reminds them of when you fell in love and how romantic you USED to be. If you only knew that just by talking to them about the "good old days" would get you exactly what you want-- instead of ignoring us and making us cry.
opposites attract (or something like that.)
This whole blog and comments section is making me laugh. I think Rodney and Aaron have a lot in common, their sense of humor is definitely one. He's told me he likes Aaron's sense of humor before, but I know he doesn't like mine or my family's.
Who wouldn't like YOUR sense of humor, Natalie? Like I said, let's have Aaron and Rod live together.. and you and your kids can move in with me. Don't you think we would have so much more fun? The men can play tennis until all hours of the night, live off cold cereal and mac and cheese-- and you and I would have a good old time.. cracking up at each others jokes and making food that someone will appreciate.
By the way, I want some more of that rice protein STUFF that you had the other day. Why can't I remember the name?
Phew!! I was starting to worry that Aaron was so perfect, that he was going to be translated and leave you to raise the children alone :)My grandparents have one of the greatest love stories I know. My grandmother was a war bride, and my grandfather still calls her "his beautiful blonde." Their relationship defined romance for me. So I was pretty surprised to have my grandmother tell me of a conversation she recently had with my grandfather that was pretty similar to what you (and everyone else) is describing. She told me that she just had to let go of needing him to respond in the way that she wanted. After 60 + years of a seemingly perfect marriage, they still have their differences. I was grateful to her for sharing this story, because it helped me be more realistic in my expectations, and try to work on letting go of needing my husband to respond in the way I want him to, and to try and focus on the positive. It also helped me realize that even the marriages that seem so ideal, and that I idolize (like yours and Aaron's) aren't perfect. Still, you gotta admit,we're pretty lucky, and I'm grateful that we've got it so good!!
Janet- I'm still laughing! I have had so many 'relationships' that were this way. So, I went on a hunt, and found Jon. He remembers everything about our dating regime, every conversation, dates, you name it. And he ends every conversation with I love you. He doesn't get 'jealous', he thanks me profusely when I cook, He hasn't noticed how fat I am, and he even notices if I change the way I do my hair or makeup.
Not that I'm trying to brag, but my husband is perfection (even though I know one side of him is totally gay-it's obvious if you listen to his IPOD), but still- I love it- and I looked for these qualities in particular in a husband. They are hard to find- trust me- I looked! I just new I needed somebody who would obsess over me- YAY ME!!
Anyhoo, just to add a little salt to the wound, he even reads the stinking blog- MY LAME BLOG- everyday when he comes home from work AND ALL THE COMMENTS!!!
Life eh?
Aaron is hilarious. He can't be held responsible for this. He just has the 'if it's not broken, don't fix it' syndrome. Maybe he should get you something sparkly (like a new chandelier to go with your silver bedroom!) Bow chika Bow wow
Jon totally sounds gay.
Look everyone, I'm making a comment. Just for the record, I "skim" the blog every so often so I don't get labeled as a robot that only eats and wants sex...too late.
Janet likes accusing me of withholding comments that will make her feel all warm and fuzzy and mushy inside. The problem is that man-brains can't differentiate between which comments will illicit that warm and fuzzy and mushy and which will cause uncontrollable seizing, crying, and gnashing of teeth.
Better to say "Cool!" and move on. Anonymous gots my back - word.
My husband saw this first and was laughing. He says he can just see Aaron lying in bed and nonchalantly, in monotone, saying all of those things.
Yes, men are pieces. Pieces of what, I just don't know yet.
I've been realizing lately how lucky I am (and I might add, YOU ARE) to have a good man who is handsome, strong in the gospel, loves his children, earns an honest living, LOVES me and is my best friend! There are SO many women out there who don't have what we have but would love to! Yes, men are annoying sometimes, but really , they are harmless. And they need love and attention from us just as much as we need it from them (maybe in a different way:) My hubby can get under my skin more than anyone else...but he also can make me happier than anyone else!
I LOVE that you said men are "harmless" that made me laugh.
One of my best friends called me this morning and said, "Your blog seemed like you were really mad! Are you okay?" It's hard to know how you come across over the computer..
The truth is, I am crazy about my husband. I love that he knows me better than anyone else and will tell me like it is. The whole point of this post was not really to bash men, but to prove how LAME we are as women.. because we NEED them to tell us how cool we are in order to feel validated. And that in itself is so pathetic! But it's the way we were made.
Anyway, I am grateful for my husband because he really tries to keep me humble.
Aww that first comment is just too sweet!
Way to go Aaron hold on to the mans side of the world. This is nova's husband not her. As you can tell I sided with the husbands side of the blog. I guess we need each other more then we both want to let on. Life is wonderful. Thanks Janet for making Nova part of your blog world.
GOOD CRAP I hate lawyers. Janet, I am totally siding with you on this issue. Mine does the same thing. It's been the epitomy of most of our arguments lately:
Me: What time are you coming home?
Him: Soon
Me: What time is soon?
Him: a few minutes
UGH-Do they just not GET IT? Tell me a time, give me a direct response, and don't give me a flimsy one word multi-meaning response to a question that I know you are just trying to avoid answering. I sometimes feel as if I paid for three years of school so he can effectively avoid my questions...do you ever get that feeling....
If SO- I am totally writing a complaint letter demanding my money back.
Why do men forget everything? Jeremy and I just had this discussion how the wife always remembers certain moments in the marriage and the husband says, I don't remember. It is so annoying. You guys are so funny. I love all your conversations.
TOO funny! i think you must've recorded that conversation in my house!
Hello and nice to meet you...I'm in from the blog train and because you left such a nice comment on my blog :o)
I love the 7 yr old conversation :o)
so cute :o)
~simply stork~
I love Ben's logic. Ty has been saying a lot of, "Mom, I already knew that." To stuff that I know he doesn't know... like the name of a dinosaur or the time i told him where babies come out.
Hey! We weren't even around for this argument! See, it's not just us that makes you fight! We are dumb women, but that's also what makes us so loveable. They would be bored if we weren't drama queens every once in awhile.
that is funny, and ben is so cute!
This was a funny time for me to read this post. The new baby and lack of sleep has Tim and I at each other lately and it is was good to know we are normal. I was feeling so guilty for our little spats, but I guess no one's marriage is perfect. (except Dee and Jon) I am afraid I am the one acting like a guys lately aka not listening to him when he talks, not giving complements, and rolling over to sleep rather than chat about our days. I have even neglected my blog.
Rach-- I think being raised by Bev (AKA the most complimentary person in the world) has handicapped all the Clawson kids. We give them out freely and expect others to give them as often as we do. When our spouses don't, we think they hate us. Let Tim know that everything will be okay, and that pretty soon he will get used to it :) jk. You know, every time I get around Tim, though, I feel like a million bucks because he is SO nice! I think our language of love is verbal..
Husbands... Can't live with them (some days), can't live without them! I think we all feel this ways some days. Sometimes I feel like the most emotionally retarded person- I get upset and know that rationally it doesn't make sense that I am upset, but I still want to be mad about something :) And sometimes I am SURE that my husband says things to see if he CAN get a reaction out of me. :)
I can tell that you and Aaron really have a lot of fun together though- what a fun couple.
oh janet... i just realized how much i've missed the blogging world. i agree with you fully and completely... my husband drives me insane and makes me a better person every day... funny how that works! and congrats on the new house... it's gorgeous!
wow and to think i almost missed this post. i've got to do better.
fun post and great comments everyone.
i love ellen. but i'm glad i'm married to matt.
men are simple and we are so complex aka complicated. we are. it sucks, but it's true. life would be so much easier as a man. don't you agree? there's got to be the perfect middle ground though? or maybe not.
LOVED the "what video," "what blog" remark. you little wise ace.
sorry, i got so riled up i posted my comment three times. i get excited easily :)
ohhhhhh men!
We talk to them
They infuriate us
We still love them
and they still love us
too funny
so glad i scanned down to find this total GEM! I am busting over aarons comment! so funny. i love this real life situation. Men are such simple creatures i love it. and who cares if we want some compliments or validation once in a while? If we have to keep their stomachs full and their balls empty, they can say "cool" a little more often! love you...tristie
Funny how 50 something comments is typical for your blog. I loved reading through this "discussion" it cracked me up! You and Aaron are such a great couple..
You say to him that "your not getting any tonight" but you know your a liar - also i read financial blogs that don't have this much information - sure is funny - and your still my favorite
Yes, that is my husband Randy. What he really wanted to say was....Not ALL women have emotional problems. Aaron we are backing you up. Aaron is the man. Sorry Jan, you are my funniest sis though.
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