shovenists

Last night we had a ward BBQ at our favorite park in Blue Diamond. Right before I left, I agreed to take my two neighbor boys (ages 3 and 1) with me. This is proof that I am completely insane... I was driving to the park with 200 hot dogs, 200 buns, chips, nachos, drinks/plates/cups/forks/tablecloths and SIX little boys in my van. All night, all I could do was laugh about the chaos I create for myself. It was a great time-- perfect weather and fantastic company. But I wasn't able to take any pictures with my new camera because I had several kids in my arms at all times.

On the way home from the park, Zack and his three year old buddy were chatting in the back seat (Ben and Luke were riding home with daddy.) Zack's friend was excited about going back to our house and playing for a bit. He kept saying over and over, "We go Janet's house. We go Janet's house."

I believe Zack was in the mood to fight (or at least pick on someone his own size) when he said with much gusto.. "It's not JANET's house! It's Aaron's house. It's my DAD'S house! He goes to work and he pays all the money. It's NOT my mom's house. My dad is charge of everyone at our house because he's the MAN."

Well, well, well. Apparently if you don't bring home the bacon, you're a nobody.

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After watching the old LDS movie Out of the Mouth of Babes, my kids were asking each other questions from the movie. Ben said to Zack: "What would you be if you weren't a Mormon?" to which Zack responded: "A Mormon." Ben said, "No, you can't say a Mormon." Zack smiled and said, "Then I guess I would be a WOMAN." After everyone finished laughing he said, "I was just kidding. I would hate to be THAT."

What am I? Chopped liver? When I told him that women are awesome and wonderful and basically even cooler than men, he looked with a blank stare and said, "Oh. My Bad." Which translates into, "Whatever."

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All of our boys are turning into motor-mouths lately. Even Luke, who has barely said 20 words his entire life, is starting to share useless information at the most inopportune times. Whenever Aaron gets home from work and is trying to tell me about his day (or vice-versa) one of the boys will be standing by just dying to interrupt with a story that neither of us care to hear.. All parents have to deal with this, I am sure. In our house, the useless information usually has something to do with Star Wars, super heroes, Poptropica or Transformers. On any given day at any given time I have to sit through some type of explanation on these trivial topics. It's annoying--- but the kids are SO excited they can hardly get out the words without spitting all over your face.

A week or so ago, after a particularly long day at work, Zack came running to Daddy (who was sitting on the couch) climbed on his back and starting screaming/spitting in his ear about how they finally passed the last level of the Star Wars lego game and how Anakin turned to Darth Vader. When he learned that Padme died, he "forced" everything around him and the computer screen exploded.. (if only I could capture that with the same excitement that Zack delivered it.) The entire time Zack was explaining this unbelievable event, Aaron and I were smiling at each other, just waiting for him to finish. Instead of saying, "That's cool." or "Tell me more about it." Aaron calmly stated, "Thanks for telling me that..." to which Zack happily skipped off. Since then, we've said it a hundred times to our kids and it works every time. It's brilliant, really. You don't have to prove that you listened or pretend that you were interested in what they were saying. You just say "thanks" and they go about on their merry way. I have been so much happier since this new phrase as been added into our family vocabulary. Until this morning.

I am talkative in the mornings. I am not married to a man who likes to talk before 2 pm. This morning, we were laying in bed, cuddling up to a chubby baby and I was talking Aaron's ear off. His eyes were not exactly opened, but I thought he was listening. At the end of explaining all that I want to do today and asking Aaron when he will be home from his tennis match, he smiled and said, "Thanks for telling me that." It was hilarious but so insulting! As if I spout out useless information all day. As if.

And these are the stories that make up my life. Girls don't get no respect around here.

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PS. To go along with this topic-- let me copy and paste what I wrote on my facebook page a few days ago.. (Monday, May 10, to be exact.)

This morning my oldest boy said, "I bet you're really sad Mother's Day is over." I said, "Yes I am. Now I have to wait another YEAR for you guys to be nice to me again." He said, "Not a year. Your birthday is coming up in a few months...."