Discipline-Free Parenting

I believe in raising responsible, happy children without discipline.  I parent without discipline and I teach others they can do the same, with amazing results.  It's not a laissez-faire parenting style that lets your kids run wild and behave however they want.  It's a very hands-on, fun, engaged approach where both you and your child behave without threatening, raising your voice, punishments or superiority.  I believe in communication and connection.  I believe in allowing your best person to show, all of the time.  Sometimes kids don't know how to be the best version of themselves and so as parents, we show them by our examples.  If we yell or fight or scream, we teach them that it's acceptable to behave poorly whenever they feel like it.  Parents don't realize they are the root of the problem and kids are misbehaving because they are responding to the negative energy they feel.  This energy can be changed.  We can flip our magnet from negative (which kids will repel and avoid) to positive (where kids listen, behave and want to obey!)  It's extremely powerful and exciting.

I don't believe in discipline because it doesn't work!  It might give you temporary results for a limited time, but it doesn't produce lasting positive behavior.  I don't believe discipline connects and unites.  If we punish in a way that keeps our children from being able to voice their opinion or feel comfortable coming to us with their point of view, then we pollute our relationship with negativity.  I don't believe you can raise responsible kids by forcing them to obey.

I believe in optimism, affection, synergy, teamwork, cohesiveness, listening with intent, and in finding solutions that produce real results.  I believe in building each other up, and I don't think discipline and punishment build anything valuable or worthwhile.  I don't think screaming or spanking or freaking out makes ANYONE feel good... not the parent or the child and I believe in creating as many opportunities that allow you to feel comfortable and validated.  Feeling welcome and needed in your own home is the most important gift we can give our children.  Communicating with real intent builds stronger relationships, deeper connections and it works!  It builds confidence in both individuals and in relationships.

I don't think it's hard for parents to stop yelling.  If you want to change, it will take about 2-3 weeks to stop.  Can you imagine a world where you ask your child to do something nicely and they happily obey?  Can you imagine your home without contention or frustration?  It can happen and it's easier than you think.  The reason why I believe it's easy is because it feels GOOD to connect with others.  It feels so much better than yelling.  It's actually quite simple when you have the right tools to stop and you'll see the difference in your children.  I stopped the bad habit of yelling and freaking out at my kids about eight years ago, on THIS DAY.  I have had very little negative interaction with my children since that experience and my house is full of busy, crazy kids.  Why did I stop so quickly? Because I felt the POWER of optimistic parenting and I want more experiences with my kids where we work together, laugh, overcome problems, create, make memories and grow as people together under the same house.  It feels SO good to see your kids for who they are and treat them with respect.  As we encourage them to be more like they are, they will stop annoying us and start behaving in ways that foster connection because they trust that they are safe around us.  If you have a strained connection in your life (with a child, spouse, family member or friend) and you don't know how to stop putting negative energy into that relationship, I'd love to help you realize how easy it is to cleanse it and start healing.  I am a parenting coach and I am really good at what I do.  Email me at janetleeshumway@gmail.com or text me at 702-485-0028. 

Xoxo.